Stop apologizing for things you don’t need to be sorry for

Today is all about how to stop apologizing for things we don't need to be sorry for. 

It hit me hard as I'm navigating raising teens, especially my oldest. She's got her driver's license, a job, and newfound freedom. It's a journey of self-discovery for her, and it made me realize how I was handing out consequences with apologies when it was her decision to make the choices she was making.

I had a conversation with a friend who's working on her masters and she told me to stop apologizing. I used to say things like, "I'm sorry, but you can't drive the truck anymore," or, "I'm sorry, you lost the privilege of having a regular cell phone." But the truth is, I'm not sorry. It's not my responsibility, nor did I perform the actions that led to these consequences.

I also had to acknowledge that my kids aren't me. I was a rule-following teenager, partly influenced by my religious upbringing. So, when it came to raising my teenagers, I trusted them perhaps too much, boundaries were pushed. 

As a mom, when you enforce a boundary or a consequence, you don't have to apologize. Yes, it sucks + it's hard and I talk about all that here, but it's so good for us to not only uphold what we say we will…. It's also a great lesson for our kids to learn because one day they just might be in our shoes! 

So, let's all gain awareness of where we apologize unnecessarily. You don't need to be sorry for taking care of yourself, setting boundaries, or teaching your kids about responsibility. 

 

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