(Season 7, Episode 3): Exploring Teacher Loneliness

Hosts: Jessica Parker-Farris / Matt Luter

Guest: Michelle Portera

Recorded/Edited by Josh Brister

• (0:53-2:36) Episode Intro - Matt shares multiple resources that suggest loneliness is not a new conversation, although perhaps an unexpected and ironic one within the educational field given that educators are largely surrounded by others all day long
  • (2:36) Matt introduces himself, Jessica, and Michelle (Josh is quietly present and recording! Thank you, Josh!) 
  • (2:36) While meeting with TEAM early on, we began a conversation about under- discussed truths, and the topic loneliness came up.

• (3:44) Question 1:  How do you sense or experience loneliness in your profession, either in yourself or in others?
  • (4:10) Michelle has sensed loneliness in her 1st grade students; we all want to be seen and understood, including our kiddos; her assistant Rachel Scott does a great job noticing their students’ needs.
  • (5:40) Matt wonders how experiences might differ among teachers based on your division or particular role; Michelle feels connected to her 1st grade team; Jessica shares how her experience of connection shifted when she shifted from a kindergarten assistant to a lead elementary art teacher.
  • (8:28) Matt similarly shares being the expert/only person teaching a given topic can be isolating; has missed having someone to lean on/collaborate with possible challenges of autonomy.
  • (9:45) An ESL teacher for a time, Michelle agrees being the “lonely expert” can “mess with your confidence” and put you on the defensive rather than feeling connected with others.
  • (10:56) Matt shares that full autonomy of curriculum is perhaps a two-edged sword; Jessica mentions perhaps that’s another conversation: how much choice is too much not just for students but teachers as well?
• (12:06) Question 2: If yes, when have you felt the most lonely? And do you think it was related to a personal situation or your role within the community? 
  • (12:58) Michelle shares her experience of being the “newbie” on her 1st grade team and its challenges; she wisely acknowledges that loneliness can be a making all of our own, like when negatively comparing yourself to others. 
  • (14:49) Matt shares the importance of connecting with others in a way that is personally nourishing or revitalizing, and ironically, that might mean spending time in a quiet room with only one other adult.
  • (16:45) Throughout the day Jessica hunts out brief moments of, as Michelle so nicely puts it, “teacher togetherness,” where she can have even a moment of connection with other peers or adults, and Michelle shares a prior experience where teachers were reprimanded for chatting in the halls with one another and its effects on morale. 

• (19:57) Question: Do you feel that loneliness is something systemic about today’s world and culture? Do you feel it’s something that spans beyond teaching roles and into other ones? (Say maintenance staff? Admin? Students?) 

• (20:13) The chicken or the egg? Loneliness now a nation-wide discussion, Matt questions the exact roles COVID-19 and digital tech both played (and perhaps still play) in preventing togetherness. 
• (23:14) Michelle reflects being truly connected might require some intentionality and wise decision making.
• (25:21) Jessica feels having shared teacher goals or objectives isn’t the same as feeling personally connected to each individual  within the community; once again, Michelle questions whether that is related to our own willingness to be vulnerable with others.
• Jessica shares a tiny shift in her schedule allowed for small moments of connection with both co-workers and parents.

• (28:25) Question 5: What do you feel has helped you feel a stronger sense of connection/belonging and to your SA community?

• • Reiterating a few successful strategies mentioned like prioritizing and daily snippets of connections, Matt shares his own need to have strong and nourishing friendships outside of work.
  • (30:08) Michelle and Jessica reflect on the benefits of their shared PLC with Rev. Hailey Allin called Living Compass and other meetings times as opportunities for connection.
  • (33:30) Michelle expresses gratitude that St. Andrew faculty have access to a counselor, not just Saint students. 

• Question 6: What do we feel St. Andrew’s does really well to help folks feel connected and maybe where is there room for growth? 
  • (34:31) Michelle and Jessica agree St. Andrew’s does a great job of prioritizing celebration; Michelle also feels incredibly connected through her multi-grade level meetings.
  • (36:19) Matt highlights the Mentor Program and its supportive nature.
  • (37:44) Sunshine Committee and community members do a great job supporting community members went there’s a need.
  • (38:50) Michelle shares the importance of proactively reaching out to others.
  • (40:29) There’s always room for growth; Jessica highlights a few she values such as evolving language, openness, awareness, and empathy. 
  • (41:07) Michelle reiterates the need to “clear the air” and have hard conversations.  
• (43:00) Matt thanks Michelle for joining him Jessica to share thoughts on our teacher truths that perhaps often go under discussed.

(44:02) We conclude that we doubt we solved teacher loneliness, but Jessica feels hopeful that, just by taking the time to have this small, quiet conversation about our shared experience of teacher loneliness, can bring us all together. We are not alone in our loneliness!