Kids & Family
S5-Ep192 - Parenting Type 2: Permissive
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Parenting type 2 would be Permissive. And a little recap is that there are 4 main parenting types. Uninvolved, permissive, authoritarian, and Authoritative. Hint – That authoritative should be your goal – it’s a style that should you be able to master, will make your life a lot easier and your kid with more chances for success.
Check out our twitter, facebook or IG links to get more links to the show notes should you want to look a little deeper. So what is permissive? Basically it’s trying to be your kids friend. We all want friends that would bury a body for us and ask us no questions, but if your 5 y/o comes to you admitting, and asking for acceptance for some bad stuff they’ve done – well that would just be odd – But our 5 year olds will be 25 year olds, and there are thousands of stories of parents whose kids come over to visit and end up admitting to writing some bad checks or getting into a fistfight at a bar – that feels like a different story – that’s in the realm of possibility – but it doesn’t have to be.
Often the warning signs were there at 5 y/o that they would fall into this pattern at 25. So what are those warning signs?
The warning signs are often being lenient or just not giving direction. Not giving direction is giving permission to the kid to rule the house. This can be easy to have happen. Maybe there’s a parent that works more or isn’t around as much – and they are lenient and accepting because they don’t want to make the time spent with their kids a battle. I get that, but everything worth doing in life is hard. So ask your partner to be on the same page as you (if you’re the one that’s around the kids more), and explain that “kids need direction, and they need boundaries” and that’s the job of ‘team parents’. Explain that a little work now is worth investing in and that you’re making your future life easier now, by doing one thing a day that is of medium difficultly.
Today – figure out if you’re being lenient or avoiding confrontation. Or if you don’t have any expectations for your children at all. Then think of what you can do to fix that – set a simple expectation tonight – and praise it when it happens.
It is Free