In this episode of Relational Lives, Ali and Ros explore a vital question: "Am I in an unhealthy relationship?" Whether it's a romantic relationship, friendship, or even a business partnership, this conversation helps you identify the subtle yet damaging signs of unhealthy dynamics. From emotional disconnection and conflict avoidance to people-pleasing and shutdown behaviours, Ali and Ros unpack what these patterns mean and how to begin addressing them.Drawing from emotionally focused therapy, this episode offers practical examples and...
In this episode of Relational Lives, Ali and Ros explore a vital question: "Am I in an unhealthy relationship?" Whether it's a romantic relationship, friendship, or even a business partnership, this conversation helps you identify the subtle yet damaging signs of unhealthy dynamics. From emotional disconnection and conflict avoidance to people-pleasing and shutdown behaviours, Ali and Ros unpack what these patterns mean and how to begin addressing them.
Drawing from emotionally focused therapy, this episode offers practical examples and three takeaway tips to help you reflect on your relationships and take meaningful steps toward repair. If you’ve ever wondered whether your relationship dynamics are helping or harming you, this is a must-watch conversation.
Shownotes:
Epiosde: Am I in an Unhealthy Relationship?
In this episode:
00:00 - Intro
01:05 - Why talk about unhealthy relationships?
02:30 - What's the difference between unhealthy and toxic relationships?
04:00 - Signs of unhealthy relationships
05:15 - Sign #1: Not being able to calmly discuss difficulties
07:40 - Sign #2: No repair after conflict
10:00 - Sign #3: People-pleasing & ignoring your own needs
12:45 - Sign #4: Shutting down or stonewalling
15:10 - Sign #5: Indifference or unintentional neglect
17:30 - Sign #6: The negative cycle explained
21:15 - Sign #7: Lack of trust or emotional safety
24:00 - Understanding what you bring into relationships
26:00 - How to start repairing unhealthy dynamics
29:00 - Sharing the episode as a starting point for discussion
30:00 - Resources to help without therapy
31:10 - 3 Takeaway Tips (incl. journaling prompt)
📍 Resources mentioned:
'Hold Me Tight' by Dr. Sue Johnson (book + online course0
Still Face Experiment by Dr. Edward Tronick
Understanding attachment styles:
https://www.podbean.com/eas/pb-xwpd3-186c726
The fearful avoidant attachment style:
https://www.podbean.com/eas/pb-npv9y-18e4e79
Healthy relationships:
https://www.podbean.com/eas/pb-3suv8-188c4bd
Connect with us:
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YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Relational_Lives
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tempo-psychotherapy-services-33a00318/
Want to share your story or come on the show to discuss your dilemma? Write to us and we might cover it in a future episode. Drop us a message at relationalives@gmail.com or you can anonymously complete our form here: https://forms.office.com/e/qcrCkbhPiT. We’d also love to hear updates if you’ve written in before.
Subscribe for future episodes on trauma, attachment and more mental health topics. If you found this episode helpful, please like this video or share it with a friend.
Disclaimer:
Please remember, this is not meant to be a replacement for personal therapy and is for information and self-reflection only. Please reach out to an appropriate professional in your area if you feel you need individualised help.
Credits:
Hosts: Alison Bickers and Ros Peckham at www.mytempo.co.uk
Music by: Stile Tree Studio
Produced by: Synergy Podcast Studio
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