Healing Through Estrangement: Eamon Dolan on Boundaries, Anger, and Breaking the Cycle of Family Trauma

What if stepping away from a harmful family relationship wasn’t an act of betrayal, but an act of healing?

In this episode, I’m joined by Eamon Dolan, author of The Power of Parting and longtime book editor, for a deeply honest conversation about childhood abuse, estrangement, boundaries, and what it really means to break generational cycles.

Eamon shares his personal journey of growing up with severe psychological and physical abuse, the long road to recognizing how deeply it shaped his inner voice, and the courageous process of setting boundaries with a parent who could not, or would not, change. Together, we explore why estrangement is so often misunderstood, why shame and silence keep so many people trapped, and how anger can be a powerful source of clarity.

Topics Covered in This Episode:

1. Why is estrangement from family almost never impulsive, and what usually leads people to that decision?
2. How does childhood abuse create an internal critical voice that follows us into adulthood?
3. Why do shame and isolation keep so many survivors silent about family trauma?
4. How can anger help identify boundaries instead of turning into rage or withdrawal?
5. Is giving parents or relatives feedback about harm an act of disrespect or an act of self-respect?
6. How does becoming a parent change the way survivors understand their own childhood abuse?
7. Why don’t boundaries destroy family relationships and how can they actually protect them?
8. Can choosing distance from harmful family members help ensure our trauma doesn’t get passed on to our children?

Connect with me on Instagram @dr.koslowitzpsychology and check out my new book Post-Traumatic Parenting: Break the Cycle and Become the Parent You Always Wanted to Be

Connect with Eamon Dolan on Instagram @eamondolan and check out Eamon's new book The Power of Parting