The 7 Phases of Divorcing a Narcissist (What No One Warns You About)

2026-01-06

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🎧 Listen to this episode if… You're separating or divorcing someone with narcissistic traits Your ex keeps changing tactics and you feel like you're always one step behind You've experienced love-bombing, guilt, threats, or emotional manipulation Your ex is running smear campaigns or trying to control the narrative Money, disclosure, or property settlement keeps getting delayed

🎧 Listen to this episode if…

You're separating or divorcing someone with narcissistic traits
Your ex keeps changing tactics and you feel like you're always one step behind
You've experienced love-bombing, guilt, threats, or emotional manipulation
Your ex is running smear campaigns or trying to control the narrative
Money, disclosure, or property settlement keeps getting delayed
Your children are being pulled into adult conflict
Your ex is using the legal system as a weapon
You feel like the abuse didn't end after separation
You want to know what's coming next before it happens

📌 Legal Disclaimer

This episode is for education only and not legal or psychological advice. Please seek your own independent legal support based on your circumstances.

📝 Episode Summary

Divorcing a narcissist isn't just difficult it's predictable. In this episode, Mum and I walk you through the seven phases most people experience when separating from someone with narcissistic traits, based on what we see every single day in real cases.

We talk about how tactics have evolved, why the mask eventually drops, and how emotional manipulation turns into smear campaigns, financial control, legal abuse, and ongoing chaos even after court ends.

We're not diagnosing anyone, and this isn't about labelling. It's about pattern recognition. Once you understand the phases, you can stop blaming yourself, protect your boundaries, and make informed decisions instead of reacting in survival mode.

📌 This episode contains discussions around family violence. Support numbers are listed below.

⏱️ Episode Timeline

00:00 Divorcing a Narcissist – What to Expect & Why It's Different

01:50 Narcissistic Traits in Divorce and Separation

02:34 Phase One: Love Bombing, Guilt Tripping & Emotional Manipulation

03:50 How Narcissists Use Legal Delays and Manipulation

07:51 Phase Two: Control Tactics, Hoovering & Threats

11:57 Setting Boundaries When Divorcing a Narcissist

14:22 Phase Three: Smear Campaigns & Image Management Tactics

16:16 How to Protect Yourself Before Things Escalate

18:23 The Financial Motives Behind 50/50 Parenting Claims

18:36 Unethical Family Court Reports & Image Control

19:54 Social Media Smear Campaigns and Reputation Control

22:18 Financial Abuse Through Control and Delay Tactics

26:18 Using Children as Pawns in High-Conflict Divorce

28:47 Manipulating the Legal System After Separation

30:48 Post-Separation Abuse: Chaos and Control After Court

32:42 Final Support, Safety Planning & What to Do Next

🔗 Links & Resources

Support Services (Australia)

1800 RESPECT – 1800 737 732
Lifeline – 13 11 14
Episodes Mentioned

The Narcissist Playbook
10 Boundaries You Must Set in Divorce https://open.spotify.com/episode/0ecDTxw4rTc3zXBkcjuYpA?si=0tfzIRFrTuWSfrywenG4lA
What About Their Belongings? https://open.spotify.com/episode/2bPd3wWLQh3pzQmL2KCR0v?si=ABBaDvMVRgqnkvfXHJh66A
Protecting Your Role as Primary Carer https://open.spotify.com/episode/6oZAEkj18NEcUfJPXP0FOT?si=PR8-zKyXRru7oVeW2Allew
Legal & Financial Abuse After Separation

https://open.spotify.com/episode/1V23F0O5yhQt9NFLPOu6uJ?si=ZkP-KquxREeTCyQPk8I-TA
What If Your Ex Lies in Court?

https://open.spotify.com/episode/5SdkXhj3vC2tfO3gDdkM6y?si=sQjxVlNSTm2wnaHQdWxdlA
Safety Planning After Separation
https://open.spotify.com/episode/5hMmTS99LaeUWOXSxKMx1D?si=Y98mBgDoTiK1LQud-tr9BQ
DARVO in Divorce https://open.spotify.com/episode/0JyfH5fCoqrUoxeDj6jCtu?si=mDoKfN3fQWONekpLUQflXg
False allegations of Parental Alienation https://open.spotify.com/episode/0l9L5SDovV515EU4H5gpIf?si=5z2-pibvRKavyrPkMeuMIw

Resources