Letting Go as an Act of Self-Compassion—with Sharon Salzberg

When Sharon Salzberg was teaching at a meditation retreat, a student asked her: Has anyone ever died of restlessness in meditation? Sharon said: Not from one moment at a time of it. 

“We have physical pain, disappointment, restlessness, and anxiety,” Sharon shared. “Whatever it is, we tend to compound it, not only: This is what I'm feeling right now. But, this is what I'm going to feel like next year. Everything congeals and feels permanent and heavy. 

But, when we realize that it's one moment at a time of it. Then, we can explore. What we see is that even though something may last over time, within itself it’s moving. It’s changing and flowing. It’s in the live system. As a friend with a severe chronic pain condition said: "I found the space within the pain.” 

How do you discover the space within the pain? 

As a renowned author, teacher, and meditation pioneer, Sharon has made a transformative difference in my internal dialogue; Most significantly, in helping me avoid being overcome by my emotions. (My most repeated Sharon phrase is: The point isn’t not to have the emotion. It’s not to be overcome by it.) In our conversation, we explore how to discern the add-ons to our internal narrative, let go of those that don’t serve us, and cultivate compassion towards ourselves and others. 

Sharon describes mindfulness as skills training. With sustained practice, these tools become ingrained; Surfacing to help you question your thoughts and redirect your energy in the moment. “Situations are complex,” she added. “But, if we’ve practiced that skill, we remember to go back into the body and feel what we're feeling. We cultivate a certain sense of balance—That's the skill.” If you feel inspired to listen to our past conversations, you can tune in here: The Cultivation of Freedom and Happiness and The Journey from Contraction to Expansiveness