Hearing Martha (Seek to Understand Rather than Persuade)

Mike Rewers decided to step into the pulpit after 25 years of listening due of his love of empathy — both in receiving empathy and in helping others to extend it. And we give less empathy when we’re blind to what is happening. The topic of empathy was week 6 of the 9-week Peaceful Practices we’ve been going through as a congregation. Mike, a therapist, spends his week helping others find ways to bring more peace into their lives. And our primary scripture for the day is with Martha and Mary in Luke 10:38-42, where Martha asks Jesus to send Mary to help serve. Mike extends his look Martha and Mary by adding two other glimpses of them from the book of John, giving us a fuller picture. In addition, you’ll hear him refer to the second passages Matthew 13: 10-15, with Jesus quoting Isaiah about listening without understanding, looking without perceiving, and hearts that have gone dull.

Mary and Martha, by He Qi

We enter the passage with a rather unpeaceful Martha — and Mike empathizes with her blindness in the situation. While it can be soothing and loving to feel understood by someone, we enter this passage with Martha feeling unseen. Yet God helps us move from being blind to seeing the one needful thing — the transformative love of God that allows us to see both within ourselves and to see others.

The more we are aware of our own blindness, the more empathy we can have for others in their blindness. Both parties on different sides of a conflict think the other just doesn’t get it. But culturally, are 50% of people just stupid? And it’s always the 50% we’re not on, right? But at some point the gospel has to be about helping us to see beyond our own perspective. When we can see that we are blind, we become more able to see the other with loving and accepting eyes, which is how God sees us — and them. But we have to bump into others to become aware of ourselves. God lives in the space between us and the other, and calls us into healing.

This passage isn’t about making Martha into Mary, but about having a deeper understanding of who each of them are — actually seeing one another. In order to see our brokenness, we need to learn forgiveness, acceptance, and vulnerability. When we can become aware of our own pain, we can begin to have empathy for others. We must be able to see the other from outside of our own perspective in order to comfort them.

Hear more as Mike walks through the emotions of Martha, and her ensuing interaction with Jesus — and how this impacts their relationships going forward.