Griffin and I discuss college graduation in 2020, how it was different for all, and what he missed most. We further discuss all the other things 2020 has uncovered; including anxiety, the need for therapy, and unbridled resilience. In this economy, recent college graduates had to manage their expectations for securing a job.... as did their parents. If a graduate was lucky enough to get a job, they may even be struggling to adapt to a new city because they may be a lot lonelier than they would have before Covid. Some of his peers are having a hard time. Therefore, people his age are aware of the need to reach out to do a meaningful check-in with friends and family.
He goes on to explain why support is paramount to success. He shares how and why therapy helped him from further spiraling into a chronic state of anxiety after he experienced panic attacks in college. He thinks anxiety is a prevalent issue for many 18-20-year-old college-age kids. He thought he was the only one who was experiencing this and his therapist suggested he ask around. To his surprise, he found that many, or most of his friends, feel the same way. He acknowledges that talking about problems, especially as males, really helps to normalize it, instead of perpetuating the stigma against therapy or emotional support. Support in groups, for helping males emotionally, is really great for people so they can learn that others are also struggling. Griffin recommends therapy and he thinks 100% of people agree that therapy and support groups are necessary but only 50 % of people engage in it.
He shares that parents should always be there for their kids, even if their kids say, "Shut up I can't talk right now". They can help their boys tap into their emotional side even if they are presenting as distant, disconnected, and angry. Parents should always be available to their kids and patient with them. They should always offer tools including access for talking to someone, and they should always offer their own presence.
Do parents know when that when they are anxious and worried about their teens, their teens are assuming it means their parents think they are a failure? Griffin thinks parents can learn to live in a middle ground of expressing that there are standards their kids need to live up to be but they don't need to push the kids to be something they don't want to be.
When it comes to racial inequalities and systematic racism, Griffin has tried to listen more and to learn more. He knows he has a long way to go, but he also thinks engaging in hard, uncomfortable conversations is vitally important. He needs to ask more questions of himself to try to be better. He also acknowledges that the learning doesn't stop and that he must listen and contribute to being an anti-racist every day. He has to keep working at it so that as a society we can change.
Groupthink is incredibly dangerous and males can sometimes engage in destructive behavior when they are together. He thinks it's imperative to try to be an upstander in these instances. He professes there are males who try to do the right thing and that is more prevalent than people give them credit for. And he continues that Groupthink can be turned onto its head for good things too. There is power in working together for right, for a good cause, rather than wrong. In order to contribute, and inspire the good kind of groupthink, he suggests finding an ally. This is especially helpful if groupthink goes into a destructive and hurtful mode. He knows there is strength in numbers and more often than not, there is someone else who wants to do the right thing.
He thinks it's up to you to find the support you need for all things 2020 and when you do, you'll live a happier more productive life. The awareness of it all is clearer now that it's nearing the end of 2020.
If you would like to be a guest, please contact info@carapollardcoaching.com
--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/carapollard/supportCompassionate Leadership in the Workplace- Part 2
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Working Mom's S.O.S. Part 2 with Kacey Hartung
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Carlota Nelson, a Global Citizen Within a Pandemic.
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