-How can defining our values help us with poor boundaries?
-What’s the difference between our unconscious and conscious values?
-Once we know our values, how can that lead to our increased ability to express ourselves?
Welcome to Episode 163! This week, I am joined by Lauren Camacho for her second appearance on the podcast. We talk all about VALUES: the how, the why, and the what when it comes to getting in touch with yours. Lauren describes how values can help us when we are confronted with a big transition in life, when it comes to transforming our boundaries from unhealthy to healthy, and as a way to help us get in better touch with ourselves. Lauren shares about her approach with her clients to help them change their unconscious values (for example, comfort and safety) to conscious (for example, honesty and compassion) as a guide for challenges in life. It’s a must-listen!
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More on this week’s guest:
Lauren Camacho is a therapist, coach, and founder of her group practice, Anew Counseling and Wellness located in Covina, CA. Anew Counseling and Wellness serves adults, teens, and couples and strives to support them in healing, growing, and thriving so they can feel better and live better.
https://www.anewcounselingandwellness.com
Be sure to contact Lauren on her website for a free therapy consultation!
More deets on the episode:
We begin with revisiting Lauren’s definition of codependency: taking or giving responsibility to someone or something else in order to meet our needs. She adds how codependents often do not get to know who they are, are unable to honor who they are, and then a piece of us (or all of us) gets lost. She emphasizes how we need to ask questions about what do we value, why we value it, and where are those values present (or not present) in our lives.
Lauren opens up about feeling codependent during her recent venture in opening her group practice: “Someone decide for me please!” She reflects on how she yearned for someone else to make decisions for her rather than take on that responsibility herself. Sound familiar?!
We shift focus to the codependency Lauren often sees in her practice. One common observation with her clients is how codependent they become while going through a difficult stage in life. Lauren reflects how these patients often regress into codependent behavior where they rely on others, experience choas/overwhelm, get into survival mode, are disorganized, and lack an inner authority.
Lauren expands on her observation of codependent clients feeling detached from themselves. She suggests that, in order to get to know ourselves, we need to start with journaling. We can answer questions like: how am I doing? Where am I feeling emotions in my body? What do I need? How do I need that need?
In order to create better boundaries, Lauren suggests getting in touch with our VALUES. Once we get in touch with our values, they will guide our boundaries and make it that much easier to set and maintain them. We conclude with hearing how our values can also help us face the times we fear getting rejected since we are in touch with why we are willing to be rejected. We conclude with a helpful reminder to be sure to recognize when your following your fear-based values versus your trust-based values.
Thank you for coming on again Lauren! And thank you dear listener for being here!
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