Parenting a Spicy One with Mary Van Geffen

In this heartfelt and eye-opening episode, Tara sits down with international parenting coach and author of "Parenting a Spicy One" Mary Van Geffen to talk about the beautiful complexity of raising strong-willed, “spicy” children. Together they unpack why parenting a spicy child can feel so isolating, and why even the very "best moms" can have "wildly defiant" kids. Mary explains how neurodivergence can shape a child’s behavior, why picking your battles matters, and how understanding a child’s underlying needs can dramatically reduce stress at home. They also explore the importance of allowing kids to fully express their emotions, setting clear expectations without harsh punishments, and recognizing the negative parenting cycles we sometimes slip into.

Mary shares practical, hope-filled tools for strengthening connection, starting with the simple act of delighting in your child. She talks about creating a “love list” to help parents affirm their child’s positive traits, build more positive interactions, and foster a warm, supportive family culture. Tara and Mary also discuss the magic of playfulness, how laughter eases tension, and why self-love is essential for any parent trying to raise a big-feeling kid with compassion. By understanding your own inner child and bringing more intention and curiosity to everyday moments, you can nurture a relationship that becomes even stronger through the years.

Links:

https://www.maryvangeffen.com/

https://www.maryvangeffen.com/parentingaspicyonebook

https://www.instagram.com/maryvangeffen

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