Kids And Divorce: the Path to Secure Attachment

Divorce can change the shape of a family without breaking a child’s sense of safety. We sit down with licensed mental health counselor Ara Mascarenas to map out what kids truly need at each stage of development—from infants who rely on proximity and sameness to teens carving out identity and voice—and how parents can protect attachment through presence, truth, and predictable connection. If you’ve wondered how to talk to your child without oversharing, how to spot parentification, or how to keep rituals alive when life gets messy, this conversation gives you clear steps and compassionate scripts.

Ara introduces the Circle of Security lens, showing how kids explore when they feel seen and return for comfort when stressed. We unpack age-specific behaviors—regression in preschoolers, loyalty conflicts in early grade school, tummy aches and shame in tweens, boundary-pushing in teens—and translate them into workable plans. You’ll learn why kind, age-appropriate truth beats silence, how to avoid parental estrangement and the disorganized attachment it can create, and how small, consistent rituals like Friday pancakes or daily 10-minute “special time” become anchors that calm the nervous system.

We also draw a firm line between healthy responsibility and harmful emotional labor. Chores build competence; carrying a parent’s pain builds anxiety. With practical examples, repair scripts, and resource recommendations—The Whole-Brain Child, Hold On to Your Kids, Good Inside, The Conscious Parent, Raising Securely Attached Kids, and Brainstorm—you’ll leave with a toolkit that meets real life where it is. No perfection required. Just steady presence, honest words, and repeated moments of delight in your child.

If this resonated, follow the show, share it with a friend who needs it, and leave a review so more parents can find practical support.

Guest: Ara Mascarenas, LMHC, of Rising Stronger Counseling

Topic:  Divorce and Childhood Attachment

Subscribe to the podcast on iTunes today!!

Your Host: Julia Manfre of Self-Care Solutions, LLC | Follow Self-Care Solutions on Facebook

Educating Women on the Tools, Skills, and Secrets of Self-Care...

Subscribe to the podcast on iTunes today!!

Your Host: Julia Manfre of Self-Care Solutions, LLC | Follow Self-Care Solutions on Facebook

Educating Women on the Tools, Skills, and Secrets of Self-Care...