These thoughts kept me silent for decades

For years, Chrissie Hodges lived a double life— on the outside, everything looked fine. But inside, she was battling nonstop intrusive thoughts she didn’t understand and couldn’t share with anyone. Thoughts so taboo and terrifying, she assumed they made her a bad person.

It wasn’t until a suicide attempt and a lucky diagnosis that Chrissie discovered what she’d been living with all along: OCD. In this raw and revealing interview, Chrissie shares the reality of surviving taboo intrusive thoughts, the shame that kept her silent for decades, and the moment she realized she wasn’t alone—and never had been.

If you’ve ever been afraid to talk about what’s really going on in your mind, this conversation will remind you there’s nothing wrong with who you are — and there IS help available.

Chapters:
0:00 Intro
2:17 When Chrissie first noticed she had OCD
7:32 Made-up narratives to justify OCD
9:50 Sexual orientation OCD
14:53 Getting on medication and going to therapy
16:15 Finally discovering pure OCD
18:47 Trying therapy can be scary
22:05 How Chrissie dealt with feelings of shame
26:52 Other taboo-intrusive thoughts
32:53 The exact taboo thoughts Chrissie experienced
38:30 You’re not alone

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