The Science of Happiness: Five Simple Strategies for Reducing Anxiety and Increasing Connection | Sonja Lyubomirsky and Harry Reis

2026-02-16

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What it really means to feel loved, and why many people who are loved don't feel it. Sonja Lyubomirsky is a preeminent happiness expert and Distinguished Professor of Psychology at the University of California. Harry Reis is one of the world's leading experts on relationships and Dean's Professor in the Department of Psychology at the University of Rochester. They are the authors of: HOW TO FEEL LOVED: The Five Mindsets That Get You More of What Matters Most. In this episode we talk about: What it really means to feel loved, and why many people who are loved don't feel it

What it really means to feel loved, and why many people who are loved don't feel it.

Sonja Lyubomirsky is a preeminent happiness expert and Distinguished Professor of Psychology at the University of California. Harry Reis is one of the world's leading experts on relationships and Dean's Professor in the Department of Psychology at the University of Rochester. They are the authors of: HOW TO FEEL LOVED: The Five Mindsets That Get You More of What Matters Most.

In this episode we talk about:

What it really means to feel loved, and why many people who are loved don't feel it
An antidote to loneliness
A broader definition of love beyond romance
Why feeling loved may be the true key to happiness
How feeling loved is more in your control than you think
The "relationship seesaw": lifting others up to feel loved yourself
The power of curiosity, listening, and reciprocity
Why dropping emotional armor is necessary for real connection
Practical tools for feeling more loved
Tips on asking better questions and showing real enthusiasm
Why genuine curiosity, reciprocity, and emotional pacing deepen connection more than performative listening

Related Episodes:

Happiness Takes Work | Sonja Lyubomirsky

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