Why Helping a Stranger Feels So Uncomfortable — Bob Fabey

Pastor and author Bob Fabey shares a moment that changed the way he sees people forever — when an elderly woman collapsed in a grocery store and shoppers literally stepped over her to check out. Host Julie Rose and Father Fabey explore why fear, inconvenience, and social conditioning keep us from stopping, even when we know someone needs help. From everyday moments of discomfort to the devastating consequences of dehumanization, this conversation examines what happens when we stop seeing people as people. ABOUT THE GUEST Bob Fabey is a pastor at Living Faith Anglican Church in Tempe, Arizona, author of “Not My Jesus” and “The Dignity Gap,” and a TEDx speaker whose work focuses on dignity, faith, and human connection. (https://www.bobfabey.com/) Episode transcript - https://uncomfypodcastbyu.blogspot.com/2026/01/why-helping-stranger-feels-so.html CHAPTERS (0:00) Introduction (0:18) Meet Bob Fabey (0:55) A Woman Collapses in a Grocery Store (2:36) When People Are Stepped Over Instead of Seen (3:16) The Rationalizations We Make to Avoid Helping (4:11) Fear, Inconvenience, and Choosing to Be Uncomfy (5:32) Learning to Practice Compassion in Real Time (7:24) A Teacher Who Changed Everything (10:27) Dignity vs. Respect (11:24) Loving People You Don’t Like (12:49) Rwanda and the Cost of Dehumanization (15:48) Final Thoughts