This coaching call is about breaking habitual patterns that are no longer needed. Today’s caller, Jenny, is having completely different reactions to different situations. She asks for guidance on how to be consistent in all areas of her life and change her attachment style. Christine discovers that it is not so much about her attachment styles but about the story she tells herself in different situations.
[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode447].
For those of us who experienced a trauma, or when the worst happened or we got in trouble for something, a neural pathway in our minds created a belief that expecting something bad to happen at any moment prepares us for future traumas and the accompanying shock. The shock is what makes trauma stay in our bodies because when we think everything’s fine, and something happens, our system is surprised. It becomes an imprint in our psyche, subconscious, emotional body, and our nervous system. Neural nets create unconscious patterns. When we are triggered we are hijacked by our subconscious.
As we grow and develop we have to update our survival strategies. So many of our survival strategies were formed when we were young. They are outdated. We have updated almost every other tool we use in our lives, yet we haven’t updated our survival strategies. When you have a habitual reaction to something, interrupt the pattern.
If you have a situation where you are bracing, expecting the worst, or getting nervous, do whatever it takes to regulate your nervous system. Take deep breaths and pause to break the habit.
Consider/Ask Yourself:
Do you feel like you’re a different person in different situations?
Are your reactions sometimes much bigger than a situation warrants?
Do you often prepare yourself for the worst even though usually the worst doesn’t happen?
As a kid, was there a part of you that felt like you were in trouble, and that you didn’t get things right?
Jenny’s Question:
Jenny would like guidance about why her reactions are different in different situations.
Jenny’s Key Insights and Ahas:
She feels she reacts differently to things at work, in relationships, and when with friends and family.
Her relationship with her parents has changed since childhood.
She often gets anxious at work and feels that she will be in trouble.
She remembers getting in trouble with her father when she didn’t do something right.
She wants validation and love from her father.
She doesn’t feel good enough at work.
How to Get Over It and On With It:
When triggered, regulate her system by putting a hand on her heart and her belly and saying “I’m not in trouble. I didn’t do anything wrong.”
Where is she telling herself she isn’t enough?
Give herself compassion and commitment. Don’t give up!
Takeaway:
When you have a habitual reaction to something, interrupt the pattern and update your survival strategy.
Sponsor:
Air Doctor — is an air filter and air purifier that creates the healthiest environment in your home. It filters out dangerous contaminants and allergens with an ultra HEPA filter that removes 99.99% of tested bacteria and viruses. To get peace of mind, order an Air Doctor today with a 30-day money-back guarantee, go to AirDoctorPro.com, and use promo code “Overit” and get up to 39% off filters and $300 off on selected models.
Resources:
Christine Hassler — Take a Coaching Assessment
Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner
Christine on Facebook
Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler
@ChristinHassler on Twitter
@ChristineHassler on Instagram
@SacredUnionCouples on Instagram
Assist@ChristineHassler.com
Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services
Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show.
Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.
CC: Lessons from the stars with Astrologer Jade Luna
EP 449: Overcoming Blocks to Moving Forward with Margaret
CC: Sleep like a Queen with Dr Leigha Saunder
EP 448: How To Feel More Confident with Lynn
CC: Stop Making Fear Based Decisions Around Money
CC: Drama Free with Nedra Tawwab
CC: The Autoimmune Cure with Dr. Sara Gottfried
EP 446: How to Give Yourself Unconditional Love with Nicole
CC: Heal Your Body with Your Mind and Energy with Brandy Gillmore
EP 445: Should You Argue When You’re Angry? With Megan
CC: Infinite Receiving with Suzy Ashworth
EP 444: Why Being Authentic is Always Your Best Strategy with Lisa
EP 443: The Reason Why You May Not Be Having Success Pursuing Your Goals with Hannah Jade
CC: Opening Your Heart to Love with Alexandra Roxo
EP 442: How to Get Attraction and Polarity Back in Your Relationship with Stephanie
CC: Goodbye Perfect with Homaira Kabir
EP 441: Should You Stay in a Relationship and Keep Trying Even When You Feel You've Tried a Lot? With Kara
CC: Understand your attachment style with Jessica Baum
EP 440: How to Stop Acting Like a Teenager When You Are a Grown Adult with Caitlyn
Create your
podcast in
minutes
It is Free
Heal, Survive & Thrive!
A Voice In The Darkness
Destiny Is Debatable (Formerly Ambiguously Blind)
جافکری | Jafekri
BPLUS بیپلاس پادکست فارسی خلاصه کتاب