NOW ENROLLING!
Check out my new pleasure course which is enrolling now through April 22, 2019 (we'll enroll again in June!). It's called Power in Pleasure: Reconnecting with Your Hunger, Desire, and Joy and runs for five weeks online. I'd love to see you there.On to your emails!
Kim wrote in with a sweet note about hearing a trauma story on episode 246 and how much it reminded her that she's not alone in her healing and trauma. Thanks for the support, Kim!
Katie has a request. As someone who is a sex researcher and who does a lot of work around sex, the thing that shocks people the most is that she didn't have intercourse for the first time until she was 30. She'd love to hear more conversations about people who don't have sex until later in life and the benefits and struggles that presents.
I have so many thoughts which include not only the importance of talking about this, but also how it ties to sex work and a sexually equitable future.
Future Mrs. is three months from getting married but she's never been less sure about whether this is what she wants. Her fiancé wants her to have threesomes with other women, and even though she's tried, she just doesn't want. But he keeps bringing it up and it's led to arguments and a lot of conflict. What can she do?
Let's talk about what it looks like to respect someone's boundaries, to have the maturity to hold that our desires will be bigger than our lives can hold, and why expectations are the enemy of connection and trust.
Finally, Distraught has had a few angry outbursts recently that have been rather abusive towards their boyfriend, and while their boyfriend does have some boundary work to do to care for themselves around it, Distraught is hoping for resources to help with anger management amid a chronic illness, changing career, and shrinking financial security. Help!
My recommendations include Karla McLaren's Gift of Anger post and her other anger post, as well as Soraya Chemaly's "Rage Becomes Her", Rebecca Traister's "Good and Mad", and Brittany Cooper's "Eloquent Rage". It might also be helpful for Distraught to check out Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha's "Care Work" and this crip lit round up on Autostraddle around the grief and realities of a body changed by chronic illness.
I also cannot recommend Cristien Storm's boundary book, "Living in Liberation" highly enough to everyone everywhere.
(All of the books are linked to Amazon with my affiliate link. Check with your local, independent bookstores first, if you can!)
Want to support the show? EVERY DOLLAR MATTERS SO MUCH. The best part is if you support at $3 per month and above, you get weekly bonus content that doesn't exist anywhere else. This week we're talking spiritual bypassing and I'm fielding a question on invisible and emotional labor that women often do. Head to patreon.com/sgrpodcast and support the show or to tune into your bonus content.
Follow Sex Gets Real on Twitter and Facebook and Dawn is on Instagram. About Host Dawn Serra:What if everything you’ve been taught about relationships, about your body, about sex is wrong? My name is Dawn Serra and I dare to ask scary questions that might lead us all towards a deeper, more connected experience of our lives.
In addition to being the host of the weekly podcast, Sex Gets Real, the creator of the online conference Explore More, I also work one-on-one with clients who are feeling stuck, confused, or disappointed with the ways they experience desire, love, and confidence.
It’s not all work, though. In my spare time, you can find me adventuring with my husband, cuddling my cats as I read a YA novel, or obsessing over MasterChef Australia.
Contact form: Click here (and it's anonymous)
301: Sex and depression with JoEllen Notte
300: Jaclyn Friedman on believing women
299: Leonore Tjia on highly sensitive people, why mental health models are anti-erotic.
298: Discharge, FGM scars, cheating during Alzheimers, & teaching kids pleasure with food
297: Christy Harrison on eating for pleasure, desirability, and being anti-diet, Part 2
296: Christy Harrison on pleasure, happiness, and being anti-diet, Part 1
295: Can we change our sexual preferences? Plus, a lesbian who wants to try sex with men.
294: Making erotic films with Inka Winter
293: Sexual attraction, gay for getting blowjobs, & cheating with a sex worker
292: Sexual assault, oral sex, and regret after a threesome
291: STIs, masturbation buddies, shame and fat bodies
290: Wheelchair sex and being scared of sex
289: When the sex stops after you move in together & non-binary pregnancy
288: Squirting and incontinence, men who don't like sex, & large breasts
287: Darcey Steinke on menopause, changing bodies, & a new way forward
286: Exploring bisexuality, life after rape, Hashimoto's & dating
285: Kai Cheng Thom on consent, healing, & pleasure
284: Learning to be vulnerable, is cheating bad, and big penises
283: Healthy relationship behaviors (green flags), community accountability
Sex Gets Real 282: Squirting, fat-friendly therapist, & when a marriage falls apart
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