What Detransition Taught Me About Identity: Alexander Linkowski on his detransition journey, informed consent, and the illusion of self

Detransitioning, a term for stopping, shifting, or reversing an initial gender transition, is a word that has been stripped of its human meaning by the political forces fighting over it. Last week, I shared my interview with Dr. Kinnon Ross MacKinnon, a trans researcher at York University whose landmark DARE study surveyed 957 people who had detransitioned. MacKinnon’s data show that the detransitioners he interviewed are not a single monolith with identical motivations, but rather four distinct groups with distinct sets of needs. Despite this emerging research, the Trump administration now attempts to justify banning care for everyone, a flagrant distortion of what the science shows we should do to support those who are both transgender and those who wish to detransition. During our discussions, MacKinnon recommended I speak with Alexander Linkowski, whom he described as a thoughtful voice from inside the detransition experience. Alexander is a 32-year-old philosopher, transhumanist, and YouTuber based in Norway. He lived as a trans woman for approximately three years before detransitioning and is currently completing a book on detransition and identity. He realized he was neurodiverse.

Alexander’s story is not political ammunition for either side. It is one person’s vulnerable story, told with honesty and philosophical depth, and it deserves to be heard on its own terms.

Alexander grew up in Poland, a deeply conservative Catholic country where 1950s ideals of masculinity and femininity shaped sex education. He described being bullied at school and told repeatedly he was “not a real man,” feeling profound discomfort in his body from early childhood, something he now understands as connected to his autism diagnosis, which he received as an adult. Living within a homophobic society, Alexander also described deep shame around his attraction to other males, buried for years. “Everything led me to believe that life would be easier, life would be better, if I lived socially as a woman.” He transitioned medically and socially at 19. Based on the DARE study, Alexander’s experience maps closely onto what MacKinnon describes as the first pathway to detransition. These are people who detransitioned with strong decisional regret, who often reported that their clinical care was not thorough enough, and fewer than half of whom felt they received adequate decision-making support before they began.

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