Episode #37: Relationship Myths Continued #2
Erica McCurdy, a certified master coach informed me, "Closure is overused and rarely gives either side the answers and mental rest that the client imagines it will. We often want closure when we have failed to address a situation at the time it took place. Because we have allowed time to pass, we have stewed, anguished, agonized over unimportant issues until they have grown into something much bigger than they ever needed to be."
Her advice? "Drop closure off at the curb, it's not your friend. Pick a new place to hang out and move on."
Jennifer:
In business… if I am the the VP of sales and I’m having an issue with one of my sales reps…
In a relationship… the emotions are wound up a bit tighter… and we typically feel like we want “closure”... It’s OFTEN TIMES because “they” don’t get what they need… and keep going.
2. Marriage or Bust
The pressure of social norms. We have get married. “Daniel and Hayley…”
There is no norm… anymore.
In business, many ppl are now breaking out of what was the norm…. getting a job, etc. In the past… social norm was to get an education and get a good job and retire. Now, the script has been flipped….
If being an entrepreneur makes you happy, working 9-5pm will kill you.
Maybe just being in a healthy, loving relationship is perfect… without the paper.
Licensed mental health counselor Daryl Cioffi told me, "I often find that my couples have warped senses of healthy behaviors in their relationships. Some of the worst advice comes from friends and family members because they themselves have unhealthy relationship patterns."
Summary:
Cultivate Health Intuition and Relationship habits.
Dr. Barbara Winter notes that, "Bad advice from an expert is telling someone exactly what to do: get a divorce, break up, end the relationship, albeit romantic, familial, business, etc." This kind of pointed, instructive guidance, then, should not be heeded from experts, no matter how well-meaning or logical it may sound. Rather, the expert's job is to guide their patient into making healthy, heartfelt decisions on their own.
Dr. Winter continued, "It's not bad advice when we recommend how to best engage, speak, or treat a partner to make a relationship healthier." So learn how to be an active listener who can make the most out of what you're told from professionals. Interrogate a situation and use the wisdom you have to make the best decisions. And listen to your heart.
New Episode Drops Every Sunday at 8am PST
Episode #45: Covid-19 and Your Relationship: An Opportunity or a Wake-Up Call
Episode #44 Business Consultant vs. Marriage Counselor
Episode #43 The LEAD Measure...How to Get MORE of What you Want
Episode 42 Married and Lonely
Episode #41: Having a 3-some. Inviting Grace
Episode #40 Investing in Your Success
Episode #39 How to Ask for What You Want
Episode #37 How to Keep the Relationship HOT!
Episode #36 Carpe Diem
Episode #35 Q&A #2
Episode #34 Don't Make Assumptions
Episode #33 Level Up Your Leadership Skills
Episode #32 Great Relationships are Messy, Just Like Great Sex
Episode #31 Monthly Goals to Increase Connection
Episode #30 Marrying for Money or for Love
Episode 29 Relationship Myths 1
Episode #28 Q&A with Listeners 1
Episode #27 The Five Stages of Marriage... and a Business.
Episode #26 Do the Work, Don't Just Talk About It
Create your
podcast in
minutes
It is Free
The Modern West
We Can Do Hard Things
The Empowered Wife Podcast
Unlocking Us with Brené Brown
Let’s Be Honest with Kristin Cavallari
I Will Teach You To Be Rich