Episode 70: Meg Cowan is a sex and relationships coach who specialises in helping people process through the impact of purity culture. In this conversation we talk about how purity culture (understood as the cultural movement in Evangelical/Pentecostal Christianity that emerges in reaction to the rapid social and moral changes that took place in the 1960s and 1970s) has impacted views on and experiences of sex, embodiment and relationships in the church. We discuss the ways in which men and women have experienced this differently, and the disproportionate impact of purity culture on women in particular. We dive into the detail on gender norms, sexual desire, the nature of arousal, power imbalances between men and women, the orgasm gap, and debunk some of the myths of purity culture. This is the first part of two conversations with Meg - and in an upcoming episode we talk about how to heal and move forward from purity culture and its impact on sex and relationships. [see below for some resource recommendations from Meg]
Get in touch via email: feedback@intheshift.com
You can find Meg at: https://www.megcowan.com/ including info about her 'Shame Free Sex' course.
Recommended Resources from Meg:
Debunking the myth that men are more visual than women with regards to sex. Meta Analysis: https://www.pnas.org/doi/10.1073/pnas.1904975116
BOOK MENTIONS
> Pure, by Linda Kay Klein
Pure: Inside the Evangelical Movement that Shamed a Generation of Young Women and How I Broke Free
https://lindakayklein.com/pure/
> The Great Sex Rescue, by Sheila Wray Gregorie.
If you identify as a Christian, this is one of the better books out there on changing the narrative about sex and christian marriage.
https://baremarriage.com/great-sex-rescue/
> Come as you are, by Emily Nagowski
Essential reading on how desire and arousal actually work.
https://www.emilynagoski.com/home
Love and Respect (on the Do NOT read list!) A lot of the teaching around these concepts of Love and Respect is spread in church, due to the bestselling (but truly terrible) book on Christian Marriage called ‘Love and Respect’ by Emerson Eggerich. Read more about why it’s so awful on Sheila Wray Gregoire’s platforms: https://baremarriage.com/2019/01/love-and-respect-why-unconditional-respect-cant-work/
Making "peace" with the past
Where we’ve been: a conversation on suffering, friendship, vulnerability and resisting hustle culture
Experiencing God (or not) - then and now
(Un)Certain: stories of deconstruction with Olivia Jackson
Experiencing God - Interpretation, suggestibility, and the harm of a withholding God
Experiencing God... or not
Dr Karen O’Donnell - Trauma-informed theology and post-traumatic remaking
Marc Fennell on ”The Kingdom” and the tangled web of megachurch experience
Another Level Part 1: The Megachurch Playbook [REISSUE]
Already Enough - LGBTQIA+ inclusion in the church (with Amanda Pilbrow)
Reframing Easter (live recording)
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’Sons and Servants’: A case study in religious conditioning
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Q & A on unravelling, changing church systems, and why we’re still Christian
Healing from spiritual trauma - with Dr Hillary McBride
Megachurch Madness - with David Farrier
Moving Beyond Purity Culture - with Meg Cowan
Celebrities for Jesus - with Katelyn Beaty
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