Wednesday is my day of healing: first therapy, and then this. My therapist thinks my dj hobby is creativity. I think it is self-expression at best. I have never believed that djs are artists or that spinning and mixing records is a performance. I have done art and I have done performance; I may do these things again, god help us all. But for reasons of trauma those are in the past.
There is plenty of new trauma unfolding in the present. Work was not going well at the time of this broadcast. I was feeling inadequate and afraid to show up as myself. Little did I know what kind of blessing the pandemic would be in this regard.
The program is my one arena for seeming and feeling competent. Listening back to the programs from this time, I do wonder what any of it has to do with "the self." I think that has gotten better, but you'll have to wait.
Since this program was broadcast, 416 days ago now, I've gone "on the air" 58 times. I have delivered 53 pre-recorded episodes on account of the pandemic. At long last I have set up my voice-over mic and preamp in my new house. I am accepting the new reality by and by, probably just in time for it to end.
BOMBAST playlist, 2020 February 26, 2100-2300:
I've killed everybody, now what
https://www.facebook.com/radiobombast?ref=hl
https://twitter.com/KidCatharsis
Outright Denial of the Dying and the Sane: Transmission 528, 2020 May 27
Sorry If I Give You PTSD: Transmission 527, 2020 May 20
Just Admit You Don’t Know What To Do: Transmission 526, 2020 May 13
Deep off into Mother Universe: Transmission 525, 2020 May 6
Hello Refusal, You’re Just the Same as Usual: Transmission 524, 2020 April 29
I Got One Doctor That I Talk to Every Week About This Panic: Transmission 523, 2020 April 22
But What Do You Expect Me To Do? Transmission 522, 2020 April 15
Let the Sirens Sing Out Their Nightmare: Transmission 521, 2020 April 8
Can You Pretend To Love Chaos? Transmission 520, 2020 April 1
My Revenge Against the World Is To Believe Everything You Say: Transmission 519, 2020 March 25
Everything's Coming to a Grinding Halt: Transmission 518, 2020 March 18
You Try To Give Me Your Money, You Better Save It: Transmission 517, 2020 March 11
No Sex or Records for a Year and a Day: Transmission 516, 2020 March 5
It's the Beginning of the End: Transmission 515, 2020 March 4
Pay Your Respects to the Vultures, For They Are Your Future: Transmission 514, 2020 February 27
All Surroundings Are Evolving: Transmission 512, February 19
Overstand the Futility of My Antics: Transmission 511, 2020 February 12
When Two Energies Collide, Wow, Magnificent: Transmission 510, 2020 February 5
They Will Sell You Back Your Heart: Transmission 509, 2020 February 1
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