Two Mr Ps in a Pod(Cast)

LO: To know school staff witness and see some shocking stuff

Episode 244 starts with Adam having an absolute stinker of a morning after waking up to discover he's been a victim of fraud with some going on a shopping spree, before drifting into a chat about nights out, drinking culture, getting older, and the strange pressure people put on you to “join in” even when you’re perfectly happy not drinking at all. From there, the episode takes a funny turn into sport, recognition in public and some classic grassroots sport observations, including kids shamelessly copying professional footballers and bringing full Premier League energy to very low-stakes matches. The main thread of the episode is all about the funniest and most painful faux pas people have ever made, and it is packed with properly toe-curling stories. There’s also another blind ranking, this time focused on classic UK playground games, which brings up all the old-school chaos of British Bulldog, Red Rover, Kiss Chase and the rest. The second half of the episode is classic school-story gold. There’s a listener dilemma about a colleague who never comes into the staff room, followed by a long run of completely ridiculous things people have witnessed in schools. As always, the episode finishes with the kind of school-based madness that makes you question how any teacher gets through the week with their sanity intact. It’s packed with awkward moments, unbelievable stories, and the sort of staffroom-style laughter that makes the whole profession feel just a little bit more survivable. 📬 Want your story featured on the pod? Submit it here: 👉 forms.gle/sWCUVURZjtn6GeN16 Here’s where you can catch the show 👇 🎭 May 2026 22nd May - Salford, Lowry 🎨 🎭 October 2026 25th October - Norwich, Epic Studios 🏰 26th October - London, Soho Walthamstow 🎤 27th October - Tunbridge Wells, Assembly Hall Theatre 🌳 28th October - Eastbourne, Devonshire Park 🌊 29th October - Colchester, Charter Hall 🏺 30th October - Southampton, O2 Guildhall ⚓ 31st October - High Wycombe, Swan 🎶 🎭 February 2027 14th February - Blackpool, Grand Theatre 🎡 15th February - Carlisle, The Sands Centre 🏞️ 16th February - Chester, Storyhouse 🐎 17th February - Crewe, Lyceum Theatre 🚂 18th February - Nottingham, Royal Concert Hall 🏹 19th February - Stoke, Victoria Hall 🏺 20th February - Stockton, Globe Theatre 🌐 🎟️ Tickets at 2mrpspodcast.com/live See you on the road again soon 👏🎤 Head to neu.org.uk/abolish-ofsted to find the Ofterd risk assessment guide from the NEU. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

LO: To know things were so much better in the early 2000s

Recorded as the slog towards Easter starts to bite, Episode 243 begins with the lads reflecting on that very familiar point in the term where teacher tiredness properly kicks in. There’s talk of spring optimism (or the lack of it), stress breakouts making a comeback, and the general feeling of clawing your way towards the next holiday while pretending you’re holding it together. The episode kicks off with a nostalgic thread about things from early 2000s Britain people didn’t realise they’d miss so much. From nights out that only required twenty quid and cheap Bacardi Breezers, to bus tickets with McDonald’s vouchers on the back, HMV album hunting, and the days when everyone watched the same TV shows at the same time, it turns into a proper trip down memory lane. The conversation drifts into how technology, phones and streaming have changed the way people experience music, films and nights out, with a discussion about whether unlimited content has actually made things feel less special. There’s also a deeper conversation around social media algorithms and the rise of controversial influencers, sparked by a recent documentary that left the lads equally fascinated and frustrated. They talk about how online platforms amplify extreme voices, the impact this has on young people, and the importance of helping the next generation understand what genuine confidence and respect actually look like. The middle of the episode delivers two classic Two Mr Ps blind rankings. First, a chaotic and slightly ridiculous ranking of infamous film parody titles purely based on wordplay, which quickly descends into uncontrollable laughter. A slightly more sensible blind ranking follows with classroom stationery, where the lads attempt to rank essential classroom items, although the results are somewhat questionable. As always, the second half of the episode is packed with listener stories from schools. There are staffroom oversharing disasters, awkward home visit moments, and one unforgettable nativity-era confession involving a mysterious bright green incident in the staff toilet that led to posters on toilet etiquette appearing around school. There’s also discussion about the most germ-ridden objects in primary schools and the strange realities of working in early years, where absolutely anything can happen. The episode wraps up with a brilliant run of “teacher tired” moments, from accidentally drinking sandpit tea made by reception children to falling asleep in meetings. ​📬 Want your story featured on the pod? Submit it here: 👉 forms.gle/sWCUVURZjtn6GeN16 Here’s where you can catch the show 👇 ​🎭 May 2026 22nd May - Salford, Lowry 🎨 🎭 October 2026 25th October - Norwich, Epic Studios 🏰 26th October - London, Soho Walthamstow 🎤 27th October - Tunbridge Wells, Assembly Hall Theatre 🌳 28th October - Eastbourne, Devonshire Park 🌊 29th October - Colchester, Charter Hall 🏺 30th October - Southampton, O2 Guildhall ⚓ 31st October - High Wycombe, Swan 🎶 🎭 February 2027 14th February - Blackpool, Grand Theatre 🎡 15th February - Carlisle, The Sands Centre 🏞️ 16th February - Chester, Storyhouse 🐎 17th February - Crewe, Lyceum Theatre 🚂 18th February - Nottingham, Royal Concert Hall 🏹 19th February - Stoke, Victoria Hall 🏺 20th February - Stockton, Globe Theatre 🌐 ​ 🎟️ Tickets at 2mrpspodcast.com/live See you on the road again soon 👏🎤 Head to neu.org.uk/abolish-ofsted to find the Ofterd risk assessment guide from the NEU. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

LO: To Not Blink If You Hear A Splat!

Recorded as spring starts to creep in (even if the weather still can’t make its mind up), Episode 242 begins with the lads reflecting on the strange world of online comments and the fine balance between loving teaching and calling out the frustrations of the system around it. There’s a bit of venting about social media criticism, a reminder of why speaking honestly about education matters, and some lovely listener messages from the recent live tour shows that highlight just how much the podcast and live events mean to people going through difficult times. With the Lowry show edging closer to a potential sell-out, there’s also a big push for the Manchester homecoming gig, which could end up being filmed if the final tickets disappear. From there, the episode takes a detour into a thread about times people have completely misunderstood what an event, film, or experience actually was. From musical theatre mishaps and unexpected concerts to cinema trips that turned out nothing like expected, it sparks a run of stories about assumptions going badly wrong and the awkward moments that follow. The blind ranking returns with a very relatable workplace theme: the different types of colleagues you encounter on a work night out. The second half of the episode is packed with classic listener submissions and classroom chaos. There are brilliant examples of children misunderstanding words and concepts, accidental classroom innuendos, and those unforgettable moments where teachers have to keep a straight face despite what’s just been said. Stories include awkward school trips, workplace misunderstandings, World Book Day mishaps, and the kind of bizarre incidents that only ever seem to happen in schools. As always, it ends with a run of jaw-dropping and slightly grim school moments, including some truly disgusting classroom encounters that will test the stomachs of even the most experienced teachers. Full of laughs, relatable teacher moments, and the sort of stories that make you grateful your own day wasn’t quite that chaotic, Episode 242 is another classic staffroom-style catch-up from the Two Mr Ps. 📬 Want your story featured on the pod? Submit it here: 👉 forms.gle/sWCUVURZjtn6GeN16 Here’s where you can catch the show 👇 ​🎭 May 2026 22nd May - Salford, Lowry 🎨 🎭 October 2026 25th October - Norwich, Epic Studios 🏰 26th October - London, Soho Walthamstow 🎤 27th October - Tunbridge Wells, Assembly Hall Theatre 🌳 28th October - Eastbourne, Devonshire Park 🌊 29th October - Colchester, Charter Hall 🏺 30th October - Southampton, O2 Guildhall ⚓ 31st October - High Wycombe, Swan 🎶 🎭 February 2027 14th February - Blackpool, Grand Theatre 🎡 15th February - Carlisle, The Sands Centre 🏞️ 16th February - Chester, Storyhouse 🐎 17th February - Crewe, Lyceum Theatre 🚂 18th February - Nottingham, Royal Concert Hall 🏹 19th February - Stoke, Victoria Hall 🏺 20th February - Stockton, Globe Theatre 🌐 ​ 🎟️ Tickets at 2mrpspodcast.com/live See you on the road again soon 👏🎤 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

LO: To Know Why You Should Never Bite Your Nails!

Recorded on the back of a huge February half-term tour run, Episode 241 kicks off with a proper thank you to everyone who packed out theatres across the country. From Edinburgh on Valentine’s Day through a full week of shows, the lads reflect on near sell-outs, standing ovations, and just how surreal it feels to have a thousand-plus school staff in a room for a night of laughs. There’s also big news as more dates are added for October and February 2027, with venues across the South and North lined up and the Lowry show in May shaping up to be one of the biggest they’ve ever done. After the tour chat, things take a sharp left into hospital ward drama. A routine visit to see their recovering dad turns into an unexpected soap opera. The blind ranking returns with “types of co-workers.” Thread of the Week then opens the floodgates to hilarious workplace stories beyond teaching. Parents’ evening horror stories make an appearance too. It’s awkward, it’s cringey, and it’s painfully relatable for anyone who’s ever sat behind a tiny table under strip lighting making small talk about phonics. The episode also tackles a genuine dilemma: is it ever okay for a teacher to pursue something romantic with a former pupil once they’re both adults? The lads don’t sit on the fence. There’s the usual run of school-based chaos too, including ridiculous parent complaints, unexpected wildlife incidents in the playground, and one truly grim Year 2 classroom moment involving a “baby worm” discovery that turns into an impromptu lesson on threadworms, nail biting, and professional composure under pressure. It’s a full episode: gratitude, gossip, rankings, dilemmas, disgust, and a healthy reminder that working in schools means you are never more than five minutes away from something utterly bizarre. Classic Two Mr Ps energy from start to finish. 📬 Want your story featured on the pod? Submit it here: 👉 forms.gle/sWCUVURZjtn6GeN16 Here’s where you can catch the show 👇 ​🎭 May 2026 22nd May - Salford, Lowry 🎨 🎭 October 2026 25th October - Norwich, Epic Studios 🏰 26th October - London, Soho Walthamstow 🎤 27th October - Tunbridge Wells, Assembly Hall Theatre 🌳 28th October - Eastbourne, Devonshire Park 🌊 29th October - Colchester, Charter Hall 🏺 30th October - Southampton, O2 Guildhall ⚓ 31st October - High Wycombe, Swan 🎶 🎭 February 2027 14th February - Blackpool, Grand Theatre 🎡 15th February - Carlisle, The Sands Centre 🏞️ 16th February - Chester, Storyhouse 🐎 17th February - Crewe, Lyceum Theatre 🚂 18th February - Nottingham, Royal Concert Hall 🏹 19th February - Stoke, Victoria Hall 🏺 20th February - Stockton, Globe Theatre 🌐 🎟️ Tickets at 2mrpspodcast.com/live See you on the road again soon 👏🎤 To find out more about how to get your school involved in the Ultimate STEM challenge from Energising Futures, with the opportunity to win a school visit from the National Robotarium, plus iPads for individual pupils, click on the link here >>> https://bit.ly/UltimateSTEMChallenge Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

LO: To wonder who Mike Upperty is?

Recorded on the very last stretch of half term, Episode 240 is a full-throttle, no-holds-barred pre-tour episode that somehow squeezes in tour hype, wholesome dad moments, pure school chaos, and some of the most jaw-dropping listener stories yet. The episode kicks off with big tour energy as the lads count down to hitting the road, with Edinburgh and Newcastle up first and a final rallying cry for Liverpool later in the month. There’s a heartfelt shoutout to their dad, usual tour driver and provider of legendary anecdotes, who’s currently recovering from a knee replacement and sitting this run out. Then it’s straight back into podcast territory with another blind ranking, this time tackling annual school events. Parents’ evenings, nativity performances, sports days, residentials, fairs, and World Book Day all get thrown into the mix, sparking plenty of debate, mild regret, and strong opinions that teachers will instantly relate to. The bulk of the episode leans hard into listener submissions, starting with brilliantly silly misunderstandings and misheard phrases that people have believed for years, ranging from song lyrics and celebrity names to everyday sayings that suddenly make sense far too late in life. It’s comforting, hilarious, and mildly alarming how many adults are just confidently wrong. Things then escalate into a long run of “how are you still alive?” stories, featuring breathtaking lapses in common sense. it’s a reminder that if you’re going to be dumb, you really do have to be tough. The second half has more school scandal stories. Affairs, shocking rumours, staffroom gossip, wildly inappropriate behaviour, safeguarding nightmares, and the sheer madness that somehow happens in school. The episode finishes strong with a mix of classic teacher horror stories and absolute gold-standard cringe. Chaotic, hilarious, and completely unfiltered, Episode 240 is a proper end-of-half-term brain dump. Equal parts laughter and disbelief, it’s exactly the kind of episode you want before a break… or before seeing the lads live on tour. ​📬 Want your story featured on the pod? Submit it here: 👉 forms.gle/sWCUVURZjtn6GeN16 Here’s where you can catch the show 👇 🎭 February 2026 14 – Edinburgh, Queen’s Hall 🎻 15 – Newcastle, Tyne Theatre 🎭 17 – Birmingham, Town Hall 🏙️ 18 – Sheffield, Memorial Hall 🧱 19 – Leicester, De Montfort Hall 🦊 20 – Bradford, St George’s Hall 🏰 22 – Cardiff, New Theatre 🏉 28 – Liverpool, Philharmonic Hall 🎸 🎭 May 2026 22 – Salford, The Lowry 🎨 🎭 October 2026 27 – Tunbridge Wells, Assembly Hall 🌳 29 – Colchester, Charter Hall 🏺 30 – Southampton, O2 Guildhall ⚓ 🎭 February 2027 14 – Blackpool, Grand Theatre 🎡 15 – Carlisle, The Sands Centre 🏞️ 16 – Chester, Storyhouse 🐎 17 – Crewe, Lyceum Theatre 🚂 18 – Nottingham, Royal Concert Hall 🏹 19 – Stoke, Victoria Hall 🏺 20 – Stockton, Globe Theatre 🌐 🎟️ Tickets are on sale now at 2mrpspodcast.com/live Stick it in the diary, round up your people and give yourself a night you’ll properly look forward to 👏🎤 To find out more about how to get your school involved in the Ultimate STEM challenge from Energising Futures, with the opportunity to win a school visit from the National Robotarium, plus iPads for individual pupils, click on the link here >>> https://bit.ly/UltimateSTEMChallenge Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices