Money For Couples with Ramit Sethi

245. "We make 6 figures. Why am I hiding fast food purchases?"

Ramit Sethi of I Will Teach You To Be Rich talks to Grace and James, a couple from Ireland, aged 38 and 37, who have been navigating immense challenges. James was diagnosed with cancer and underwent a year of treatment, while Grace managed a difficult pregnancy and maternity leave with their second child, an infant. Amidst the fear and grief, their household income took a significant hit, causing financial strain. Grace felt the burden of managing their finances, leading to guilt about James continuing to work during his illness. Despite these hardships, they’ve built a strong financial foundation with high savings and have managed to stay afloat. Ramit helps them explore their individual money psychologies, the impact of their upbringings, and how their shared experiences have shaped their financial outlook, revealing a story of resilience, unwavering teamwork, and an inspiring pursuit of a rich life. In this episode we uncover: • How Grace feels immense pressure to manage finances • The emotional toll of James's cancer diagnosis • Grace's hidden "mindless" spending under stress • The Irish perspective on "mustn't grumble" about money • James's childhood money messages and aversion to debt • The surprising freedom found in small financial wins • Grace's proactive approach to long-term financial planning • The power of internal versus external locus of control • How a shared money philosophy can emerge from conflict • The importance of planning for the worst when at your best • Their inspiring journey of overcoming adversity as a team Chapters: (00:00:00) Introduction (00:05:13) Grace's guilt over James working during cancer (00:12:32) Grace's "mindless purchases" and coping mechanisms (00:15:55) The surprising reality of their financial stability (00:30:03) Contrasting money philosophies: big spend vs. small treats (00:33:45) Reviewing their Conscious Spending Plan and uncovering hidden wealth (00:46:12) The impact of fluctuating income on their financial outlook (00:55:00) Planning for the worst when they are at their best (01:00:16) James's upbringing and the origins of his money anxiety (01:11:10) Their "ice cream cone" fight and early money revelations This episode is brought to you by: Notion | Try Notion, now with Notion Agent, at https://notion.com/ramit LMNT | Get a free 8-count Sample Pack with any LMNT order at https://drinklmnt.com/RAMIT Fabric by Gerber Life | Join the thousands of parents who trust Fabric to protect their family. Apply today in just minutes at https://meetfabric.com/ramit Facet | As of the date of this recording, Facet is waiving their $250 enrollment fee for new annual members, and for my audience, Facet is offering $300 into your brokerage account if you invest and maintain $5,000 within your first 90 days. Head to facet.com/ramit to learn more about which membership option is best for you. Offer expires March 31, 2026. #FacetAd  Shopify | Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at https://shopify.com/ramit Connect with Ramit • Get my new book, Money For Couples • Get Money Coaching with Ramit  • Download the Conscious Spending Plan • Listen to my book—now on Audible • Get my New York Times best-selling book • Get my no-numbers journal • Other episodes • Instagram • Twitter • YouTube If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here: https://iwt.com/apply 

244. "I'm in $244k debt but give $500/mo to my church"

Ramit Sethi of I Will Teach You To Be Rich continues his discussion with Mike and Noel in part two of their financial deep dive. The couple, married for just 6 months, faces a daunting $244K in debt with zero savings, fueled by previous "guilt-free" spending and a shocking $170K windfall that disappeared. Despite their dire situation, major cuts to their fixed costs haven't happened yet. Ramit encourages Noel to reconsider her church tithing and find proactive ways to increase income, like driving for Uber. Can they shift their mindset from feeling deprived to purposeful sacrifice, anchor their spending to zero, and collaboratively create a sustainable financial future? In this episode we uncover: • Noel’s decision regarding her church tithing • The power of incremental income, like Noel’s potential earnings from Uber • Ramit’s "anchor to zero" framework for mindful spending • How comparing current spending to past mistakes sabotages financial progress • The importance of distinguishing between sacrifice and suffering • Why making big changes with money is meant to be hard • The potential for selling household items to boost savings and signal a "rebuilding phase" • How a short-term financial plan can set them up for long-term success • The opportunity to define their own timeline for debt repayment and savings Chapters: (00:00:00) Previously on money for couples (00:02:09) How Noel's decided to approach tithing (00:03:33) Why cutting subscriptions won't solve their problems (00:03:49) Noel's plan to earn more money with Uber (00:04:21) Ramit introduces the "anchor to zero" spending framework (00:05:46) Mike and Noel reflect on the conversation (00:07:11) Sacrifice vs. suffering: Reframing financial changes (00:08:43) Why comparing to the past holds them back (00:09:50) Noel's internal struggle with tithing (00:10:34) Ramit presents a vision for their future (00:11:15) The idea of selling household items to fund savings (00:12:18) Ramit's proposal for their next steps and a follow-up This episode is brought to you by: ZocDoc | Go to https://zocdoc.com/ramit to find and instantly book a top-rated doctor today #sponsored  DeleteMe | Get 20% off all consumer plans when you go to https://joindeleteme.com/ramit and use promo code RAMIT at checkout Leesa | Go to https://leesa.com for 25% off mattresses PLUS get an extra $50 off with promo code RAMIT, exclusive for my listeners Factor | Go to https://factormeals.com/ramit50OFF and use code RAMIT50OFF to get 50% off your first box, plus free breakfast for 1 year Trust & Will | Protect what matters most in minutes at https://trustandwill.com/ramit and get 10% off plus free shipping Connect with Ramit • Get my new book, Money For Couples • Get Money Coaching with Ramit  • Download the Conscious Spending Plan • Listen to my book—now on Audible • Get my New York Times best-selling book • Get my no-numbers journal • Other episodes • Instagram • Twitter • YouTube If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here: https://iwt.com/apply 

243. "She inherited $171K…but it’s already gone."

Ramit Sethi of I Will Teach You To Be Rich talks to Mike and Noel, a young couple who are both 34. They married just 6 months ago, but financial fights have become a daily occurrence, even after receiving a $170K windfall. Mike blames Noel for overspending, but admits they both struggle with money, while Noel views the windfall as "guilt-free" spending. With $244K in debt, zero savings, and 82% of their income going to fixed costs, Ramit helps them uncover the root of their money woes. Will they finally get on the same page, create a financial system that works, and learn to trust each other with money? In this episode we uncover: • How Mike’s money anxiety leads him to check his bank account 20 times a day • The shocking truth about their $170K windfall • Why Mike’s anxiety worsens when he makes more money • The one money rule Mike and Noel both broke • How Mike’s upbringing shaped his money habits • Why Noel feels like she's "drowning" and has no control over their finances • The spending categories that reveal their money psychology • Why Mike's "money is mine" mentality is holding them back • Noel’s struggle to “hand over her paycheck” • The credit card debt that keeps piling up • Ramit’s radical approach to cutting fixed costs • The “Glade Plug-in” budget that explains everything • Noel’s difficult decision about tithing and faith • Why benchmarking against past mistakes is a recipe for disaster • The truth about their approach to money Chapters: (00:00:00) “We just kinda like get whatever we want whenever we want it” (00:07:02) “I was stressing more than ever before” (00:14:04) The one money rule they both broke (00:24:29) “You treat me like a child” (00:32:39) Ramit identifies their “money leaks” (00:39:34) “I don’t want to hand over my paycheck” (00:47:30) “My goals are not being met” (00:55:38) The “Glade Plug-in” budget (01:00:03) “I do wanna have a Glade budget” (01:06:50) How Mike’s upbringing shaped his money habits (01:15:10) Ramit shares his radical advice (01:21:10) Preview for part two This episode is brought to you by: Bilt | Join the loyalty program for renters at https://joinbilt.com/ramit Wispr Flow | Try Wispr Flow for free at wisprflow.ai/ramit Gelt | Book a tax consultation with Gelt at https://joingelt.com/ramit. As a member of my community, you can skip the waitlist Netsuite | Get the free guide “Demystifying AI” at https://netsuite.com/ramit Fabric by Gerber Life | Join the thousands of parents who trust Fabric to protect their family. Apply today in just minutes at https://meetfabric.com/ramit Connect with Ramit Get my new book, Money For Couples Get Money Coaching with Ramit  Download the Conscious Spending Plan Listen to my book—now on Audible Get my New York Times best-selling book Get my no-numbers journal Other episodes Instagram Twitter YouTube If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here: https://iwt.com/apply

242. "Our couples therapist couldn’t fix this. Please help."

Ramit Sethi of I Will Teach You To Be Rich talks to Natalie and Chris, married with two young kids and a net worth of $1.3 million. Despite their significant assets, money remains a constant source of conflict, especially when unexpected expenses arise. Chris tends to "freak out," emotionally withdrawing and becoming zombie-like, leaving Natalie feeling alone. This pattern, which Chris describes as "catastrophizing," has intensified since their kids' expenses piled up.  Their therapist recommended they talk to Ramit, hoping to establish a financial game plan to prevent Chris's emotional collapses. Currently, 81% of their income goes to fixed costs, with 0% to savings, leading to a feeling of constant stress and no margin for error. Can Ramit help them create a financial system that provides peace of mind and allows Chris to process financial challenges with less distress? In this episode we uncover: • The unexpected source of Chris and Natalie’s referral to Ramit • How large, unexpected expenses trigger Chris’s emotional “shutdown” • Natalie’s experience of feeling isolated when Chris is financially stressed • Why having a $1.3 million net worth doesn’t alleviate their financial anxiety • The surprising reason for their elevated fixed costs and lack of savings  • The emotional impact of feeling like there’s “nothing left over” at the end of the month  • Chris’s pattern of “catastrophizing” and the fear of successive financial blows  • The core question their therapist hopes Ramit can answer  • How Chris’s upbringing influences his current financial anxieties  • The challenges of discussing money when past traumas intertwine with current stresses Chapters: (00:00:00) “Your therapist...recommended that you speak to me” (00:10:55) “Natalie, what’s your role in money?” (00:25:43) The unexpected (and huge) financial blindspot (00:36:18) Ramit discovers a massive amount of hidden money (00:45:01) “You are financially set up for life” (00:54:02) How "Red Bull wingsuit" leads to a Rich Life (01:19:20) Finding an extra $1,360/month (01:44:23) Natalie and Chris’s follow-up: “He’s at ease now” This episode is brought to you by: ZocDoc | Download the ZocDoc app for FREE at https://zocdoc.com/ramit then find and book a top-rated doctor today #sponsored  Notion | Try Notion, now with Notion Agent, at https://notion.com/ramit DeleteMe | If you want to get your personal information removed from the web, go to https://joindeleteme.com/ramit for 20% off Gusto | Try Gusto at http://gusto.com/ramit and get 3 months free when you run your first payroll Facet | Facet is waiving their $250 enrollment fee for new annual members, and for my audience, Facet is offering $300 into your brokerage account if you invest and maintain $5,000 within your first 90 days. Head to facet.com/ramit to learn more about which membership option is best for you. Offer expires March 31, 2026. #FacetAd  Connect with Ramit • ⁠Get my new book, Money For Couples⁠ • ⁠Get Money Coaching with Ramit⁠ • ⁠Download the Conscious Spending Plan⁠ • ⁠Listen to my book—now on Audible⁠ • ⁠Get my New York Times best-selling book⁠ • ⁠Get my no-numbers journal⁠ • ⁠Other episodes⁠ • ⁠Instagram⁠ • ⁠Twitter⁠ • ⁠YouTube If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here: https://iwt.com/apply 

241. “We invested our wedding money…in psychedelics”

Two couples take the stage with a shared question—but very different financial realities: When is “enough” actually enough to move forward? Finn and Luna built a successful pet-sitting business and now sit on hundreds of thousands of dollars—but with no clear plan for investing, homeownership, or the future. Meanwhile, Monica and Antonio earn a strong income, are completely debt-free, and yet feel paralyzed by fear as they juggle parenting, aging parents, and the possibility of purchasing a larger home. In this live episode, Ramit digs into the tension between optimism and realism, abundance and anxiety. Together, they confront inherited money stories, decision paralysis, and what it really takes to turn income into confidence—so money stops being the thing that holds them back. In this episode we uncover: • Why having “hundreds of thousands of dollars” can still feel like total financial chaos without a system • The emotional whiplash of going from paycheck-to-paycheck to sudden abundance • How Finn and Luna’s optimism vs. realism split shows up in every conversation about housing, investing, and location • Why crypto success without understanding risk creates false confidence • The real reason Luna pulled money out of investments and parked it in cash • How not knowing basic investing terms keeps progress stalled • Finn’s fear that California homeownership is a ticking time bomb • Monica and Antonio’s decision paralysis despite high income and zero debt • How generational trauma, bankruptcies, and lost homes shaped Monica’s daily money anxiety • Why Antonio believes earning more is the solution • The financial and emotional toll of supporting aging parents while raising young children • The hidden cost of being “responsible for everyone” and never prioritizing your own future • The shift from reacting emotionally to money toward making deliberate, shared financial decisions • What changes when money stops being mysterious Chapters: (00:00:00) “I’m a dreamer”—and he just wants a real plan (00:25:32) What happens when the optimizer stops optimizing at home? (00:33:01) “They gave up everything for us” (00:46:33) “We make great money—but it doesn’t feel like enough” (00:57:52) “I set the bar so high I can never win” (01:04:37) Where are they now? Both couples’ follow-ups This episode is brought to you by: Bilt | Join the loyalty program for renters at https://joinbilt.com/ramit Shopify | Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at https://shopify.com/ramit Fabric by Gerber Life | Join the thousands of parents who trust Fabric to protect their family. Apply today in just minutes at https://meetfabric.com/ramit Gelt | Book a tax consultation with Gelt at https://joingelt.com/ramit. As a member of my community, you can skip the waitlist LMNT | Get a free 8-count Sample Pack with any LMNT order at https://drinklmnt.com/RAMIT Masterclass | Get up to 50% off Masterclass during the holiday season at https://masterclass.com/ramit Links mentioned in this episode • If you want help with your finances, join my Money Coaching program at https://iwt.com/moneycoaching Connect with Ramit • Get my new book, Money For Couples • Get Money Coaching with Ramit • Download the Conscious Spending Plan • Listen to my book—now on Audible • Get my New York Times best-selling book • Get my no-numbers journal • Other episodes • Instagram • Twitter • YouTube If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here.