Dating, Relationships, and Disability

86 - Too Busy To Date?

“I’m just really busy.” How often have you heard this and have also found yourself saying it? About anything? We live in a too busy world. I sometimes find it being my automatic response when people ask how I am. It’s probably very valid. You are busy. Life frequently offers a lot to us. It can be very hard to say no. But….many times what keeps us busy is not what is most important or will give us the results we really want in our life. Being "too busy" can be an excuse to avoid dating and potential heartbreak. It felt safe to keep myself occupied and not take the risk of getting hurt. But deep down, I knew I was missing out on meaningful connections and the opportunity for love. Breaking free from the cycle of using busyness as an excuse It took some self-reflection and a realization that my fear of getting hurt was hindering my chances of finding a fulfilling relationship. I had to prioritize my happiness and make space in my life for dating. It meant reevaluating my schedule, setting boundaries, and making a conscious effort to carve out time for socializing and meeting new people. It also meant I had to get really honest with myself that I was using being too busy to avoid being vulnerable and getting hurt. However, I was just hurting myself in a different way by isolating myself from love under the guise of a busy calendar. So, for those who find themselves constantly using busyness as an excuse, what advice would help? The first step is to acknowledge that being busy is a choice we make. We have control over how we manage our time and priorities. It's important to assess what truly matters to us and make room for relationships. Start by identifying any unnecessary commitments or activities that can be scaled back or eliminated. Delegate tasks if possible, and learn to say no to things that don't align with your priorities. Remember, making time for love is really about putting yourself first and that your desire for love is as important as any other aspect of our lives. There are many potential fears and concerns that may be driving individuals to use busyness as an excuse. What are some common underlying reasons behind this behavior? One common fear is the fear of vulnerability and getting hurt. Dating requires opening ourselves up to the possibility of rejection or disappointment, which can be scary. Using busyness as an excuse shields us from those potential hurts. Additionally, some people may have experienced past relationship traumas or have a fear of commitment. These factors can contribute to the desire to stay busy and avoid emotional risks. It’s important to recognize that taking emotional risks is a natural part of dating and finding a meaningful connection. While there are no guarantees, the rewards of love and companionship are worth the vulnerability. Seek support from friends or a thCheck out our Dating Memberships:Dating Made Easier (for all people wanting to date) - is a monthly membership for anyone (with or without disabilities) who wants support and guidance in dating skills and getting the RESULTS you want in dating and relationships. Click here to learn more. Supporting Dating and Relationships membership (for special educators and professionals in disability services) - is for professionals in the disability field who are looking for training and resources to effectively help students/people with disabilities in developing dating and relationship skills. Click here to learn more. Music by Successful Motivation | Artwork photo by Elevate

85 - Rejection Survival Guide

Rejection is something many people fear, regardless of their ability or disability. I hesitated to put myself out there and avoided pursuing relationships. It took a toll on my self-esteem and held me back from experiencing the joy of dating. In fact, it stopped me from dating for several years.It wasn't easy, but I realized that rejection is a part of life for everyone, regardless of ability or disability. I began to acknowledge that rejection hurts, but it doesn't define me. It's a temporary setback, not a permanent label. I started reframing my mindset and focusing on my strengths and what I have to offer in a relationship.It's essential to recognize that rejection is not a reflection of your worth as a person. Everyone faces rejection at some point in their lives, and it doesn't diminish their value. It’s important to surround yourself with supportive friends and a community that understands and appreciates you. They can provide the encouragement and reassurance you need during challenging times.How can you maintain a positive attitude and not let it hinder your dating journey?Self-compassion. Treat yourself with kindness and understanding, just as you would a friend going through a similar situation. Remember that rejection is often a result of compatibility issues or personal circumstances, rather than a reflection of your worthiness of love. Embrace the rejection as an opportunity for growth and self-improvement. Additionally, focus on your accomplishments and the positive aspects of your life. Celebrating those successes will remind you of your value and boost your confidence.Now, let's discuss the importance of effective communication when faced with rejection. What role does it play in maintaining healthy relationships?Communication is vital, both in expressing our feelings and in understanding the feelings of others. When faced with rejection, it's essential to have open and honest conversations with the other person involved. This helps to gain clarity and closure, allowing both individuals to move forward and learn from the experience. It's also important to remember that rejection can be an opportunity to reassess our preferences and priorities, ensuring that we are seeking compatible relationships.Remember that rejection is a part of life's journey for everyone. It's not unique to you. Embrace the fact that rejection can be a stepping stone toward finding the right person. Allow yourself to grow from these experiencesand keep an open heart. The right person will appreciate and love you for who you are, disability and all. Don't let rejection define your dating journey or limit your possibilities for happiness.The Rejection Survival Guide Download The Rejection Survival Guide to see rejection in a new way so that it doeCheck out our Dating Memberships:Dating Made Easier (for all people wanting to date) - is a monthly membership for anyone (with or without disabilities) who wants support and guidance in dating skills and getting the RESULTS you want in dating and relationships. Click here to learn more. Supporting Dating and Relationships membership (for special educators and professionals in disability services) - is for professionals in the disability field who are looking for training and resources to effectively help students/people with disabilities in developing dating and relationship skills. Click here to learn more. Music by Successful Motivation | Artwork photo by Elevate