MEL ROBBINS: How to Stop People-Pleasing Without Feeling Guilty (Follow THIS Simple Rule to Set Boundaries and Stop Putting Yourself Last!)

2026-01-14

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Jay is joined on stage at Boston’s Wang Theatre by his longtime friend Mel Robbins, in front of a packed live audience. Their shared history allows them to speak openly and honestly about the pressure to be liked, the fear of being misunderstood, and how easily we lose ourselves trying to meet other people’s expectations. Mel’s superpower is her ability to choose herself in moments when giving up or staying small feels safer. Mel shares the hard truths she’s learned about self-criticism, people-pleasing, and why waiting to feel “ready” keeps us stuck. Jay reflect...

Mel shares the hard truths she’s learned about self-criticism, people-pleasing, and why waiting to feel “ready” keeps us stuck. Jay reflects on how constantly judging and fixing ourselves pulls us away from our inner life, and why real growth starts with awareness and self-respect. Mel also talks about how many of her biggest changes came from desperation, not confidence, and Jay reframes jealousy, fear, and failure as signs that something meaningful is trying to emerge.

In this episode, you'll learn:

How to Stop Letting Other People’s Opinions Run Your Life

How to Quiet Your Inner Critic When Stress Takes Over

How to Unlearn the Self-Criticism You Were Taught Growing Up

How to Stop Waiting to Feel “Ready” to Start Living Your Life

How to Break the Habit of People-Pleasing Without Guilt

How to Use Jealousy as a Clue Instead of a Curse

How to Keep Going When Desperation, Not Confidence, Is Driving You

Life doesn’t change all at once. It changes when you choose to speak to yourself with kindness, honor your needs, and take the next step even when you’re afraid.

With Love and Gratitude,

Jay Shetty

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What We Discuss:

00:00 Intro

00:17 What Do We Really Worry About Most?

02:12 How to Quiet the Inner Critic

15:50 Stop Obsessing Over the Physical

18:17 How People-Pleasing Is Actually a Form of Control

25:02 Start Listening to Your Own Needs

29:54 Finding the Strength to Let Go and Move Forward

41:15 Is it a Vibe or Not a Vibe?

46:18 Creating Safety by Letting Go of Judgment

50:04 The Power of Outlasting Yourself