Amira Posner joins us today as we're digging into how to recognize your patterns and why this matters if you are TTC. We all have them. Patterns. The things we do over and over again. Some of them are great, others are not very helpful for us. Studies say that over ⅔ of our spontaneous thoughts are negative. And while it can be difficult to stay positive when we’re the middle of a struggle - it's important to remember that there are a beginning and an end. This will not last forever. So how do we identify our negative patterns (i.e. imp...
Amira Posner joins us today as we're digging into how to recognize your patterns and why this matters if you are TTC.
We all have them. Patterns. The things we do over and over again.
Some of them are great, others are not very helpful for us.
Studies say that over ⅔ of our spontaneous thoughts are negative.
And while it can be difficult to stay positive when we’re the middle of a struggle - it's important to remember that there are a beginning and an end. This will not last forever.
So how do we identify our negative patterns (i.e. impatience, worry, anger, self-criticizing, etc.).
The first step is awareness.
I'm excited to welcome Amira Posner back to the podcast. Amira is a professional therapist with Bachelor and Masters Degrees in Social Work.
She also has formal training in hypnotherapy, Reiki, and the relaxation response. Amira and I work very closely together! We also co-facilitate the online Mindfulness Fertility Series together.
This is a 6-week online program that helps embrace your fertility journey with proven relaxation techniques and stress management strategies that help you regain control and cope with infertility in a much more positive way! Our next session starts Sept 17, 2020, at 7:30 pm EST.
Go to https://fabfertile.com/shop/mindfulness series to sign up.
On this episode, you’ll learn:
1) How to know when you are stuck in an unhelpful pattern
2) How do we ease our suffering? We discuss awareness, the intention to change, taking ourselves off automatic pilot, and developing a plan.
3) Strategies to help when you have a negative thought
4) How self-compassion can help and provide comfort during difficult times. Plus what would you tell a friend in a similar situation to you?
5) Why self-pity can be a slippery slope and how to notice the signs.
TIMESTAMPS:
06:28- INTRO AND AMIRA POSNER'S BIO
08:12- WHAT ARE "PATTERNS" AND WHY ARE THEY IMPORTANT?
How the fertility journey is sometimes the vessel that shows us the negative patterns in our lives How catching negative patterns in your life can ease suffering How our thoughts are bent towards the negative One of the biggest patterns that Amira sees working with clients
12:32- RECOGNIZING THE NEED TO CONTROL AND VISUALIZATION
The difficulty in visualization when we try to protect ourselves from pain The role of belief in visualization Dealing with the thought "What if this doesn't happen?" "It's not easy work. It's scary." The importance (and difficulty) of being vulnerable
16:40- DEALING WITH COMPARISION
"We are all on our own journey" Blocking out temptations to compare
17:50- HOW DO WE EASE SUFFERING
Changing the way we relate to ourselves "Suffering is what gives us awareness" Changing the way we relate to infertility Moving out of auto-pilot and being intentional
19:20- HOW TO RAISE AWARENESS WITH OUR THOUGHTS
Meditation's role in raising awareness and combatting unhealthy patterns Being present in your meditation Blowing a "kiss" and letting it go
21:30- SELF-COMPASSION AND BEING KIND TO YOURSELF
Powerful statements you can say to better connect with yourself Reframing difficulties The power of asking yourself how you would respond to your friend
22:50- CONNECTING WITH YOUR INNER CHILD TO CHANNEL SELF-LOVE
How to visualize yourself as a child and feel love for yourself
24:20- MOVING PAST SELF-PITY (WHEN IT IS NOT HEALTHY)
The balance of self-pity and giving yourself space to feel Moving past it where it will not control you "Struggle has a beginning, middle, and end" Finding different ways of relating to yourself
27:37- THE IMPORTANCE OF MEDITATION AND BUILDING A PRACTICE
How sometimes the thing we need the most we let go of first The importance of self-care and why it's critical to make time for it What fears cause you to be hard on yourself Dealing with impatience
31:48- RESOURCE RECOMMENDATIONS
The importance of what you are putting into your mind
35:05- MINDFULNESS SERIES DETAILS
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Text For US residents text FERTILE to 55444 to access your free fertility yoga video.
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For the non-US residents go to www.yogafreebie.com to access your free fertility yoga video. In this 20-minute intro video, we focus on a calming and peaceful practice to connect back to our heart. These simple yoga poses can help quiet negative thoughts and make you feel more in control.
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Related episodes:
Functional Medicine 101: https://fabfertile.com/blog/functional-medicine-101-and-your-fertility/
Everything You Need To Know About EFT if you are TTC: https://getpregnant.libsyn.com/website/everything-you-need-to-know-about-eft-if-you-are-ttc
The Soul of Your Baby Is Waiting for You: https://getpregnant.libsyn.com/website/the-soul-of-your-baby-is-waiting-for-you
