When the Marriage Is Over, but the Mortgage Isn’t

Most people think a marriage in trouble can be downgraded into a business arrangement to protect the house. Dr. Lisle says that is the previous investment trap talking, not your judgment. The four walls are not where the happiness lives, and the asset you are protecting is far less valuable than the years you would spend chained to a dead relationship to keep it.

In this episode, Dr. Doug Lisle answers two listener questions that sit at opposite ends of the romantic life cycle. A 28-year-old wants to convert her marriage to a 40-year-old husband into a business partnership to keep the house they just bought. A 70-year-old hopeless romantic is troubled to learn relationships are transactional and wonders why the men chasing her are half her age.

Dr. Lisle unpacks the previous investment trap, the real reason housing has become a financial trap, why every interaction is a cost-benefit analysis without being cold, the difference between lust mechanisms and love instincts, and why a soft flirty stance attracts casual mating strategy suitors no matter your age.

Key question covered: Are all relationships transactional, and if so, how do you tell the difference between someone activating your love instincts and someone running a cost-benefit analysis on your house, your pension, and your car?

Beat Your Genes is co-hosted by evolutionary psychologist Dr. Doug Lisle, PhD and Nathan Gershfeld

New episodes every other week.

YouTube: youtube.com/@BeatYourGenes

beatyourgenes.org

Doug Lisle: esteemdynamics.com

Nathan Gershfeld: fastingescape.com

X: @BeatYourGenes

Intro and outro: City of Happy Ones. Ferenc Hegedus. Licensed for use. Copyright Beat Your Genes Podcast