Welcome to episode #111!In this episode, Matt and Braden talk about whether it is possible to affair proof a marriage, and what steps we can all take to strengthen our marriages so that we are not vulnerable to having an affair.Pray TogetherStudies show that couples that pray together regularly and consistently have a much higher rate of marital satisfaction and success. Carving out time every day to pray is not just a nicety or an optional endeavour, praying together is a vital activity we all ...
Welcome to episode #111!
In this episode, Matt and Braden talk about whether it is possible to affair proof a marriage, and what steps we can all take to strengthen our marriages so that we are not vulnerable to having an affair.
Pray Together
Studies show that couples that pray together regularly and consistently have a much higher rate of marital satisfaction and success. Carving out time every day to pray is not just a nicety or an optional endeavour, praying together is a vital activity we all need to move forward in. That doesn't mean it will be easy or necessarily come naturally, but if we make it a priority, we will see a greater degree of connection to God as a couple and to one another.
Lay Together
When we build our intimacy with one another our bonds grow deeper and stronger. Sex is a God-given need in our marriages, and when we build our greater intimacy overall we are less susceptible to looking outside the marriage. But intimacy isn't contained to just sex, as we need to build emotional, spiritual and, physical intimacy with one another and that takes vulnerability and trust. What can we all do today to move towards one another in this area?
Pay Together
Secrets and hiddenness are damaging to a marriage, and keeping separate finances doesn't build our greater intimacy with one another. When we spend money and keep that activity a secret from our spouse, we are taking part in financial infidelity. If we engage in that behaviour we may become more comfortable keeping other secrets from our spouse, and we can become prone to holding things back from our spouse in a greater degree. Any form of secret keeping is harmful to our marriage, and may make us more susceptible to an affair.
Play Together
Friendship is central to our marriages, and when we lose that friendship with our spouse we can begin the long slow process of drifting apart. We need to play together in building our friendship, whether it is in finding shared activities we both enjoy, dating, having fun with one another, and laughing together. We need to keep being friends!!
Say Together
Ongoing communication is key to building our marital oneness, and that includes sharing our hearts with our spouse. We need to get adept at sharing with our spouse, and to build a space for one another to share and feel supported. When we stop talking we can get comfortable in that silence, and it creates coldness and walls in our marriage, and that is when we are more prone to going outside the marriage for that need. Affairs are rarely simply about sex, but more so a need to feel connected.
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Resources
Pure Freedom Community for men 18+
Pure Freedom Journey for men and women
Book a FREE call (men)
Course for marriages
FamilyLife Canada: Resources and events to strengthen your marriage
Online marriage resources (FamilyLife Canada)
Covenant Eyes Accountability Software - use promo code RM30 for 30 days free
Podcast Hosts
BRADEN HAFNER
Braden is the Regional Director in Alberta for FamilyLife Canada. He has been married for 13 years to his wife Kristen, and they live in Edmonton, Alberta. He is passionate about seeing marriages grow and thrive, and helping couples move to a deeper oneness with one another and with God. FamilyLife Canada has a variety of resources and events to help you and your spouse take your marriage to the next level. See what would benefit you at www.familylifecanada.com
MATT CLINE
Matt and his wife Louise raise their little guys, David and Oliver, in Edmonton, Alberta. He is honoured to do what he can to tackle the epidemic of pornography and sexual perversion in every way possible. Seeing lives and marriages get free and experience the love of God in profound ways is what drives him every day. He leads Restored Ministries, is a certified speaker and coach for the John Maxwell Team, and formerly played hockey in the WHL and for Hockey Canada. You can visit www.restoredministries.ca.
