Charlotte Bellamy on Grieving a Baby She Never Got to Know

In this week’s episode of Therapy Works, I’m joined by Charlotte Bellamy, who speaks with extraordinary openness about the death of her son Finn, who was stillborn at 28 weeks. Charlotte takes us through the shock of reduced movements, the devastating moment she was told “there’s no heartbeat”, and the surreal reality that even in loss, you still have to give birth. We talk about the grief of missing the baby you’d imagined, alongside the trauma of what happens medically and physically, and Charlotte shares how her sister, a midwife, supported her and her husband Milo through those first unbearable days and helped them create precious memories with Finn.

We also explore how Charlotte and Milo grieved differently, why therapy and understanding the body’s response to grief helped, and how fear can shape everything that comes after. Charlotte describes the marathon of pregnancy after loss and the practical ways she protected herself, from having someone with her at scans to telling staff upfront what she needed. At the end, Sophie and Emily join me to reflect on the importance of support, naming, and speaking about the baby who has died, because using Finn’s name and remembering him isn’t “bringing it up”, it’s honouring a life that mattered.
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