409 From Turn the Ship Around to Rethinking Decisions: David Marquet on Leading with Distance, Not Ego

In this thought-provoking conversation, former nuclear submarine commander and bestselling author David Marquet returns to the Partnering Leadership podcast to discuss the core ideas behind his new book: Distancing: How Great Leaders Reframe to Make Better Decisions. Known globally for Turn the Ship Around, Marquet once again challenges traditional leadership assumptions—this time taking aim at a problem many leaders don’t realize they have: they’re too close to their decisions.

Drawing from cognitive psychology, real-world leadership failures, and hard-earned lessons from the military to the boardroom, Marquet introduces a powerful framework he calls “distancing.” At its core: the idea that our best decisions often require us to stop thinking like ourselves. Whether it's asking, “What would my replacement do?” or considering how a future version of yourself might evaluate today’s choice, Marquet offers tactical ways leaders can gain clarity, reduce bias, and improve judgment under pressure.

Host Mahan Tavakoli guides the conversation toward the real-world application of these ideas, especially for senior executives navigating complexity, volatility, and the weight of past decisions. Marquet’s insights are sharp, often counterintuitive, and supported by both research and field-tested leadership practices.

Rather than offering platitudes or yet another leadership model, this conversation digs into the cognitive traps leaders fall into—and how to build the mental discipline to lead with more perspective and fewer blind spots. If you’re responsible for high-stakes decisions, leading through uncertainty, or shaping organizational strategy, this episode delivers the kind of clarity that shifts how you think about thinking.

Actionable Takeaways

• You’ll learn why “being present” isn’t always good advice—and how it can narrow your thinking at the worst possible time
  
  
  
• Hear how one shift in language (“What would you do if you were me?”) led to better decisions from Marquet’s submarine crew—and how it applies to leadership teams today
  
  
  
• Discover why ego isn’t about arrogance—it’s about how your brain rewrites reality to protect your self-image
  
  
  
• Learn the three dimensions of strategic distancing—and how each one can improve executive judgment under pressure
  
  
  
• Hear how asking “What would my replacement do?” helped Intel’s Andy Grove overcome years of legacy inertia
  
  
  
• Find out why most retrospectives fall flat—and how to reframe them so people tell the truth without getting defensive
  
  
  
• Learn how stress shortens your mental lens—and what leaders can do to create space (not just speed) in decision-making
  
  
  
• Explore why decision hygiene matters more in volatile times—and what most leaders get wrong about intuition
  
  
  
• You’ll learn why leadership isn’t a conceptual exercise—and why Marquet compares it to learning a new language
  
  
  
• Hear the low-stakes practice Marquet recommends for building real-world empowerment habits—starting at your next restaurant meal
  
  
  

Connect with David Marquet

David Marquet Website 

David Marquet LinkedIn 

Connect with Mahan Tavakoli:

Mahan Tavakoli Website

Mahan Tavakoli on LinkedIn

Partnering Leadership Website