Boundaries and The Need for Space with Jennifer Laine

This week Sam welcomes CEO, Jennifer Laine. Jennifer Laine began her career as a pit trader at the Chicago Board of Trade. Being the only woman in her pit, she learned first-hand, what separates great leaders from bad ones and more importantly great people from bad ones. With a drive for pursuing her passion and too many years in the trenches crunching numbers, she left the board and began consulting in the fashion & art space for companies such as LVMH, Samsung, & Porsche. Marrying her knowledge of human behavior with an expertise in building brand awareness, she began working with Dr. Henry Cloud, a clinical psychologist who consults for Fortune 100 companies on developing their employees both personally and professionally. Segment  1 Sam opens up with a quote from Mike Dooley and The Universe. The quote was ‘to love like crazy including ourselves.’ Sam then reads a quote from Abraham, ‘The more you say, i don’t remember the more you don’t remember.’ Sam introduces Jennifer Laine, previously a pit trader at the Chicago Board of Trade. Jennifer Laine explains how she went from growing up and working on a farm to trading Soy on the market. Jennifer talks about growing up on a farm, how she tried out living in LA, worked in Chicago, and finally settled on New York City. Segment 2 Sam brings up how in the corporate world the leadership does not embody the traits they are calling for, Jennifer’s work at Cloud Productions involves bring those ideals into action. She talks about the struggles in changing the behaviors of leadership. Jennifer also talks about how to lead a team while trying to ‘wear multiple hats’ while managing and working with over twenty people in multiple cities: nashville, seattle, san francisco, LA, new york, and london. And how to ‘be a student of my job.’ Boundaries is a theme and focus in Jennifer’s work. Because of technology people have to adapt to new boundaries. In her first book she did not cover how email and smartphones would expand boundaries. So, instead of writing a new book they released a multimedia project about boundaries online with Boundaries.ME. Segment 3 Jennifer begins by talking about how Dr. Henry Cloud defines and addresses boundaries. Sam talks about how his boundaries have changed over the course of his life. When he was younger he enjoyed being in large crowds and events, but now he finds these things draining. Jennifer compares emotional to physical pain and how they differ. She notes that it can be harder to realize the effects of emotional pain because it is not as direct. An example of this emotional pain comes in the process of saying “no”, especially when dealing with the reply. When you want to soften your boundaries and open up more, Jennifer suggests that you only do this with someone you feel comfortable with. Sam mentions that one boundary that is hard for people to break down is the constant use of a cell phone. Jennifer explains the different elements that make the immediacy of communication more prevalent.  Segment 4 Jennifer talks in depth about boundaries.me and how the subscription helps you address and build healthy boundaries. There are specific Facebook groups that you they manage as well that cater to specifics, like parents, businesses, etc. The most common feedback they get is that people who participate feel they are more in control and happy with their life. They also have closer and stronger relationships with the people in their life. Jennifer talks about her own boundaries and says that your background and culture have a large impact on them. Sam sympathizes with these differences because of the fact that his wife is Chinese and has completely different boundaries than him. Jennifer’s one major takeaway is that when “no” is the right answer, don’t feel guilty about it because you know you’re doing the right thing.