Passive Men Don’t Get Entrusted With Cities

2026-02-13

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Most men make decisions by asking, "What's the smartest choice?" But what if your decisions aren't just problems to solve, they're training for something you haven't been shown yet?In this episode, I walk through three real decisions I'm facing right now — an investment property, relationship priorities for a family of nine, and whether to compete in a BJJ tournament against my doctor's advice — and why I stopped treating them as problems and started treating them as formation.I break down the difference between how most men app...

Most men make decisions by asking, "What's the smartest choice?" But what if your decisions aren't just problems to solve, they're training for something you haven't been shown yet?

In this episode, I walk through three real decisions I'm facing right now — an investment property, relationship priorities for a family of nine, and whether to compete in a BJJ tournament against my doctor's advice — and why I stopped treating them as problems and started treating them as formation.

I break down the difference between how most men approach decisions and how an aspiring elder thinks about them, and I introduce a framework I've been developing that changes not just what you decide, but what your decisions are actually for.

If you want the full six-question framework, subscribe to Elder My City at read.timschmoyer.com and you'll get "The Elder's Decision-Making Framework" guide in your welcome email.

✉️ Subscribe to get my free guide, "The Elder's Decision-Making Framework: A Step-By-Step Guide for Godly Leadership."

📝 Read ⁠⁠the full post for this episode⁠⁠ and leave a comment on my Substack.

🎙️ Leave ⁠⁠a voicemail for a future episode⁠⁠.

CHAPTERS

00:00 - Welcome & The Challenge of Decision Making

01:00 - Example 1: Investment Property Decision

03:25 - Example 2: Family Time & Relationships

04:53 - Example 3: BJJ Tournament vs Doctor's Advice

05:30 - How Most Men Make Decisions

06:36 - A Different Operating System for God-Fearing Men

08:49 - The Elder's Questions vs Common Questions

12:16 - Decisions as Training for Kingdom Responsibility

15:19 - Applying the Framework to Real Decisions

17:33 - The Elder's Decision Making Framework (Free Guide)

19:40 - Being More Than a "Good Dad"

21:15 - Closing & Call to Action

Get the free guide, "The Elder's Decision-Making Framework: A Step-by-Step Guide for Godly Leadership," by subscribing to my Substack posts. Totally free. I have nothing to sell you.

Questions? Thoughts? Comments? Leave me a voicemail message to use in a future podcast episode.

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