#471: Comparison is Killing Your Confidence and Happiness

Podcast #471 Comparison is Killing Your Confidence and Happiness Comparison is a default thought pattern that is killing your confidence and happiness, however, you can learn how to neutralize its negative impact on your life. This podcast episode gives 21 comparison detox strategies, along with 12 happiness hygiene habits to help you be victorious in your mental management of comparison in your life. Comparison is rooted is fear, and you can uproot both from your life, starting with this coaching. Get the full show notes at www.trishblackwell.com/471 The sneaky way that fear shows up in comparison and what the fear underneath the comparison is doing to your confidence and your futureHappiness hygiene habits and how they help you detox toxic comparison from your default thinking patternsUnmanaged comparison versus managed comparison and what to do about it other than saying "I know I shouldn't be comparing myself, but …" Taking ownership of your relationship with comparison and your relationship with the level of happiness you have in your life.   REVIEW OF THE WEEK:   Just what I needed, 5 Stars, Christina Slater From the first episode I listened to I was completely drawn in. I felt like I was being heard and that this is where I was going to get that extra help, that boost that I needed. I'd highly recommend this podcast.   PATREON UPDATE Announcing new options for supporting this amazing show. Hop over to my Patreon page for all of the options, including a new $7 /month support option that delivers Weekly Journaling Prompts. Additionally, you can become part of my VIP Squad, which includes all of our normal patron goodies, AND a shout out on the air, as well as the right to personally request the topic for an upcoming podcast. This week we're shouting out to Ryan Painter for being our first to snag one of the VIP Squad spots! Thank you for your support, Ryan! Go to www.trishblackwell.com/patreon to get started   LET'S COACH ON COMPARSION   Can we get real? Comparison is fear-based. Fear that we aren't enough. Fear that we don't belong. Fear that we aren't doing enough. Fear that we don't measure up. And the last time I checked, fear is not of God. I love this because it frees me. I can give my brain permission to feel the fear and then let it pass through, because it doesn't belong in me or on me. It's human to have, and the enemy of my soul uses fear to try to persuade me out of the light and joy into sadness and depression - but God always wins; since I know that, that means I have the victory (and the permission) already to live by faith, not fear. So, pause this for a minute. Think about the comparison in your life. And then fill in this sentence: …When I feel "not enough" in this area _________ I am actually just afraid that _______________. For me, it's been: When I feel not popular enough, I am afraid awkward and that I don't belong.When I feel not fit enough , I am afraid that my body will keep me from being loved.When I feel not pretty enough, I am afraid that people won't like me or see me.When I feel not successful enough, I am afraid that I am wasting my potential. Notice how you will recognize the "feeling not enough" … and when we pull back from our feelings to our thoughts, it's our thoughts that are FEAR BASED THOUGHTS that are creating the NOT ENOUGH FEELING … and those thoughts and feelings are both driven from the ACTION of COMPARISON.   UNMANAGED COMPARISON JUST ISN'T HELPFUL Learn to let go of unhelpful thinking. Unmanaged Comparison > unaware, focused on others instead of yourself, default, comparing up / comparing down, fear-based motivationManaged Comparison > intentional, internally focused in a healthy way, data-driven or focused with purpose outside of oneself Comparing. Looking around. Makes your journey longer and you less effective. Stay in your own lane.