In the third conversation with Beverly Delidow of Here’s a Quarter we drop a lot of recommendations, all available at the bottom of this episode description, in case you get curious and wanna find out more.
Diving into the difference between the laws of tribal and modern societies, the distinctive difference in their rally cries for redemption versus retribution reminded me of an amazing Moth-story by Hector Black, that I blogged about in April of 2014. Hectors tells a horrible story of his daughter (in love, if not by birth), and shows an absolutely astonishing ability to forgive.
I mention (yet another book) by Daniel Quinn. Not called WHEN but IF they give you lined paper, write sideways. But honestly… it’s not a matter of IF, it is a matter of WHEN, as we are all given lined paper, that is, lulled into believing the norm-driving stories of the culture(s) we live in.
Immersing myself in Daniel Quinns writings as well as spending a lot of time with my Buddha-friend Dominic, has gotten me to a place where I finally (I’ve said it before and will say it again, sometimes it takes a long time for the penny to drop) have started to see the importance of context. Who says what, based on what hidden, underlying assumptions? When a question is asked, try to get under the skin of it, finding out what’s implied by the question.
That’s what Quinn means when he says write sideways.
Don’t. Just. Swallow. It.
Or, stated in another way:
Think. For. Yourself.
Honestly, I find that a lot harder than it sounds. Especially as I choose to trust (in me, in you, in the world), and will remain in trust until proven wrong.
Now there’s some tankespjärn for you!
Links:
Hector Black on The Moth
If they give you lined paper, write sideways, by Daniel Quinn
I mention attachment theory, speaking about Ross Green but honestly, who I meant to refer to is Gordon Neufeld. Sorry about that! But hey, two for the price of one, Green is worth a look too!
There’s The children’s fire and The Imitation Game too.
62. Parenting: the reactions of the parent | with Özlem Tan
61. Each person has had their own journey here | with Mandell
60. My precious, my trauma, my pain | with Kate Inglis
59. I don’t want to do the good thing. I want to do the real thing. | with Bella
58. We try to fix everything. Maybe there is no fixing to be done? | with Luke Aymon
57. Role models in our own relations | with Özlem Tan
56. Books are wisdom just laying about in your house | with Mandell Conway
55. The everyday reality of all those that came before us | with Kate Inglis
54. The algorithms don't invite tankespjärn. Conversations do. | with Matthew, Andy & Izzy
53. Conversations make for a great playground where learning is rife | with Inma, Reddy & Steve
52. I blew it up! | with Steve Emery
51. Taking yourself too seriously stops the flow of life | with Izzy
50. Notifications are alarm clocks that someone else set for you | with Andy Mort
49. Violence is bad and Maybe violence isn’t all that bad | with Reddy
48. Gifting is an indication that you want to be in community | with Matthew & Inma
47. Judgement and discernment in reflection | with Steve Emery
46. The discovery of our pleasures | with Izzy
45. The rooted fire within | with Andy Mort
44. Connections - already there and always will be | with Reddy
43. Giving and receiving or buying and selling? | with Inma & Matthew
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