What to do when you survived your goal but are miserable along the way [Episode 253]

Have you had the experience of committing to a hard goal but found yourself miserable along the way? 

Arielle shared with me that she had made it through her first semester of grad school as a mom with four young kids, but it was a miserable experience. Instead of seeing it as a failure, I shared the 5-Step Path From Curious To Committed. 

5 Step Path From Curious To Committed:

1. Curious - Identify what you would like to try or start (like grad school or a podcast).

2. Consistent - Set a timeframe to try (podcast for one year or do a semester of grad school).

3. Clarity - Come back to the drawing board and see how this thing fits in your life. Look at the data (podcasting is great, and I have tons of ideas to keep going; grad school was incredibly hard on my family - how big is my why?).

4. Confidence - Now, you can either move forward or let go.

5. Committed - Your goals can now be more specific as you are committed to the long-term process and what really matters in that field (a certain number of downloads, focus on metrics that matter in grad school).

As I discussed this path with Arielle, we determined she was on step three. It is time for her to evaluate the date and decide if she wants to continue with grad school. 

But just because something feels really hard doesn't mean it's not worth doing. As Andrew and I have reminded ourselves many times during difficult seasons for our family, hard doesn’t mean wrong. However, it has served as a signal for us to pause and take stock of what really matters to us AND how we are thinking about our circumstances.

So far, quitting in the middle of misery hasn’t been the right answer, but getting clear on what is in our circle of influence to make things better quickly becomes a top priority. 

Listen to this week’s episode for more thoughts on this process and to find out what step you might be on with your goals.