Empathy in Action: How to Listen Actively and Connect on a Deeper Level

In this episode of The Optimistic American, Paul Johnson and Dr. Emily Bashah sit down with Dr. Mark Goulston, a psychiatrist, executive coach, and consultant to major organizations. He is the inventor and developer of the Surgical Empathy Process, where he uses focused empathetic listening to break through to people and free them of their internal emotional and psychological blocks.

• Paul and Emily introduce Mark Goulston and the uniqueness of his work.
• Mark describes his journey to psychology and how he dropped out of med school twice.
• The three main steps in the Trifecta of Hope and learning to listen to people's hurt.
• Emily shares the approach she uses with suicidal patients - and what it takes to overcome the pain that won't go away.
• Paul and Mark talk about the different forms of extremism and how to deprogram a radicalized person.
• Emily describes the power of active listening instead of forcing your ideals on others.
• Mark reveals how the Magic Paradox technique can be used to show extremists that you understand what nobody else understands.
• Understand that people are listening for something as they're listening to you.
• Mark shares the steps he would take when he feels a conversation is not going well.
• Paul and Mark talk about finding meaning in life.
• For Mark, being an empathetic listener is about seeing the good in people and believing they're doing their best.
• Mark shares how he helps suicidal people see that finding something worth living for is possible.
• Mark describes his role in the OJ Simpson trial - and how detectives unsuccessfully tried to play psychological tricks on him.
• According to Mark, talking to extremists is difficult because they aim to make you feel powerless and helpless.
• When you feel that your spouse is tolerating you, Mark believes it can be painful until you realize how difficult you are and then it's a gift.
• Emily reveals the best thing you can do to support radicalized family members.
• How difficult people work: they set you up and corner you.
• Paul highlights the best way to act when confronted by an angry person.
• Mark's approach to talking to people that drive you crazy.
• According to Mark, most people don't do well with conflict. They either get angry or avoid it.
• Mark dissects the three steps to turn aggressive conflict into healthy conflict. 

 

 

Mentioned in This Episode:

optamerican.com

Addictive Ideologies: Finding Meaning and Agency When Politics Fail You by Dr Emily Bashah and Hon Paul Johnson