Ep 114. How to Stop Reacting and Start Choosing: ADHD & Emotional Regulation and The Bee vs. The SUV

Ever find yourself saying yes when you’re already overwhelmed… or lying in the heat of the moment even though you know better?

This video breaks down how ADHD and nervous system dysregulation affects your ability to make real choices. Using a real life example “The Bee and the SUV,” I explain what happens when your brain perceives a threat—and how to get back into decision-making mode instead of reacting in ways that don't serve you.

You’ll learn:
-How your brain reacts to emotional and social threats, not just physical ones
-Why we often say “yes” to things we don’t want to do (and how to STOP)
-How to identify what’s really bothering you (the bee) vs. what actually has long-term consequences (the SUV)
-Why even lying can be a nervous system response—not always a moral failure.

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  Timestamps:
  00:00 – Intro + what dysregulated decisions look like
  00:30 – Story: My daughter, the bee, and the SUV
  01:40 – Why we react instead of choose when overwhelmed
  02:20 – Expanding the definition of "threat"
  03:00 – How ADHD intensifies nervous system responses
  04:10 – Client story: Saying yes out of fear, not choice
  05:50 – Common “bees”: rejection, failure, confusion, overwhelm
  07:30 – Tools: Pause and ask, “What’s the bee? What’s the SUV?”
  09:45 – Helping kids (and ourselves) understand lying as reaction
  12:00 – Rabid raccoons, viral videos, and our human brains
  13:45 – Final thoughts: Self-compassion and lowering the threat level