Idealizing, Devaluing & Discarding - Narcissistic Control

Narcissistic Abusers use Idealizing, Devaluing & Discarding as a way of controlling victims. The initial love bombing stage is done to make the victim feel exceptional and as if they have found the perfect partner. The narcissistic abuser will then engage in the process of Devaluation which includes put downs, humiliation, gaslighting and withholding of love. The Discard phase is when the narcissistic abuse throws out the victim and sees the partner as needy, demanding and no longer a valid source of narcissistic supply. It is important for victims to see the relationship for what it was, a con job and an emotional manipulation. Victims will need to work through the many layers of intense emotions that came with the chorus of having emotions toyed with and used against the victim.