18: Birth stories of my 3 children

TRANSCRIPT FOR EP18:
Welcome to Woman Leadership show. I'm Janet and in this episode, I will be sharing with you my wonderful birth stories and how I decided to have waterbirth delivery for my third boy. 

I had no experience as first mother and I did not have friends who have shared many stories of their birth and I knew epidural was commonly used to assist birth process. Hence, back then I listened to my colleague who had 2 kids and she would asked for epidural the moment she has contraction so as not oto feel the pain. As the saying goes, your thinking will be determined by who you hand out with. As she was my closer colleague who I had lunch everyday and she has prior birth experience, I would listen to her stories of birth and how painful it can be so epidural at the onset was the best option. She had to bedrest for her second child before her baby was due. That deep impression on how she handled birth has also affected my decision to have epidural for my first and second baby. Though I heard about opting for caseran but I would still wanted to try the natural birth. 

I requested for epidural for my first delivery as I had induction so as to speed up the process as my contraction was long, as a result the baby hearbeat dropped and I had to be assisted with vaccum to aid the delivery of the process. Recently, I found out our birthing process will affect the head structure of the baby as well as the emotions of the baby later on in life. 
When came to my second daughter birh, it was easier for me as I already knew what to do and I wanted to try without epidural. When the pain became unbearable, I asked for epidural but it did not last as my girl came out shortly. Good thing that the epidural did not go to her directly but it still went into breast milk when she breastfeed. 

During my journey of personal development, I met a friend who happened to talk to me about natural birthing and emotions during pregnancy , birth and after birth will have an effect on the baby temperement. 2 months before the due date, I found out about more about birthing classes and a well known doula who had classed and supported me for a natural birth. A Birth without any drugs and epidural and minimal medical intervention. I could choose natural options such as waterbirth and aromatherapy and music in the room. It was the most wonderful experience as the water naturally reduce the birthing pain and baby was delivered in the water where he slowly moved from water into land. There was no medical intervention and I truly felt the whole birthing experience was natural and under less stress from the medical intervention. Best of all, no drugs in my body and transferred to the baby. 

Being mother is a wonderful and a very nurturing role and we give our best to our children. After having my own children, I became more understanding and patient towards my mother whom I used to blame her for my bad childhood memories and not giving me like what other kids have in terms of time and comfort. She did what she can at her time and to her best ability. We are not perfect and is a lifelong learning for us as mothers.  

From this waterbirth experience, again I have a breakthrough of trying out a waterbirth and with all natural intervention not something that every mother is comfortable or would consider to do it. It is okay as we have our choices and options in life as long we are happy and no feel guilty about what we have done and not done for ourselves and children. It is never too late at any age to change and tweak our parenting style and relationship with them. My grandmother at the age of 93 was still worried for my mum who was 68 years old when she had Parkinson condition. Do not be afraid to try new things just like when I was not sure of the unknown and it was only 2 months away before the due date, I still took the courage and tried it. I was so glad that I did it as I would not have the chance to try it anymore after my third kid. I learned from the first 2 children birthing experience and wanted to do better for my third child. As long as we enough research, preparation and have faith that all will be fine in our choices, we will be at peace with the outcome irregardless . 
There would be different opinions on what your birth plan should be like and whether you should breastfeed but to me I know what is best for my kids to my best ability with my own mother instinct. We learn from others but again be selective who we learn from as it could affect our decisions and thoughts.  

I hope that through my sharing, it draws inspiration and personal reflection for you. I believe every woman can be a leader in your own way. I look forward to seeing you in my next episode where I will be sharing with you tips and ways to realize your full potential as a leader on Woman Leadership.