10 Second Hug #7

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what can a 10 second hug do? 

1 dopamine

2 creates a safe environment for vulnerability

3 relieve stress and boost immune system

4 and 5 Reignites physical affection and physical attraction

6 opens up avenues of communication

 

Aaaaand #7 a ten second hug is territorial. It simply says you are mine! 

Let me be quite frank… I don’t want you coming up during church and hugging my wife from the front… nor does my wife want women coming up and hugging me from the front… either way - NO BOOBY hugs! 

I teach on Proxemics OR the science of space no not astronomy… but on space and territory in human behavior. One of the illustrations I do is showing people how when I hug someone my hand on the back - or the placement of that hand says a lot about how well I think I know that person.

If I hug them and my hand is just on the top of the shoulder…(12 o’clock) I barely know them

If My hand is on their mid back, I know them pretty well, 

If my hand is on their lower back I really know them

and if my hand is on their buttocks I better be married to them… because that is intimacy! 

 

Have you ever been dancing with your partner or spouse and you grab their butt? Ever hugged them really close in public?

Ever been away from them for a week or longer and when you see them you grab them and hang on for a good 20 seconds…

What is all this saying? YOU ARE MINE!

Now wether you do it in public or not- it still screams THIS IS MY TERRITORY… HANDS OFF! 

 

Song of Solomon 8:6

Set me as a seal upon your heart, As a seal upon your arm; For love is as strong as death, Jealousy as cruel as the grave; Its flames are flames of fire, A most vehement flame.

This is a love song from a bride to her groom… interesting that it is from a woman’s perspective…yet is very applicable to a man. 

 

Why was such jealousy aroused in this scripture? Well in the verse before it says we are leaning on each other… physical touch. It aroused jealousy or in other words territorial obsession. When you hug you are sealing the deal… verse 6 says you are a seal on my heart. Look we all want stuff to be fresh… I like fresh veggies, fresh fruit, fresh paint, fresh bread… a good seal does that. Does your relationship feel stale??? Maybe you need to work on your seal. 

Look here is what I am trying to get at… there are millions of people who simply feel unwanted in marriage, in relationships - because they no longer have that territorial touch or connection. 

 

being Territorial has a lot to do with identity as a couple. I want people to know we are a THANG…

I WANT MY WIFE TO KNOW AND FEEL WE ARE A THANG! A hug does that if it is more than 10 seconds.