How to Stop Self-Sabotage & Reclaim Your Power when Your Partner Won’t Change -with Dr. Ray Doktor
In this episode, Lora Cheadle welcomes Dr. Ray Doktor, a life and relationship coach, to explore the deep emotional work required to heal from betrayal. Together, they unpack why men often struggle to express emotions, how women can stop waiting for a partner’s “potential,” and the self-sabotaging patterns that keep people stuck.
Top 3 Takeaways:
Healing Starts ...
How to Stop Self-Sabotage & Reclaim Your Power when Your Partner Won’t Change -with Dr. Ray Doktor
In this episode, Lora Cheadle welcomes Dr. Ray Doktor, a life and relationship coach, to explore the deep emotional work required to heal from betrayal. Together, they unpack why men often struggle to express emotions, how women can stop waiting for a partner’s “potential,” and the self-sabotaging patterns that keep people stuck.
Top 3 Takeaways:
- Healing Starts with You – Infidelity shakes your sense of self, but recovery begins by turning inward and rebuilding your relationship with yourself.
- Wishful Thinking vs. Reality – Many women hold onto their partner’s “potential,” but true healing comes from accepting who they really are, not who you wish they could be.
- Men and Emotional Avoidance – Many men avoid deep emotional work, opting for quick-fix pleasure (cheating, drinking, distractions) over true healing. A thriving relationship requires both partners to grow together.
Bio: Ray Doktor, Psy. D. works as a modern day relationship & rapid breakthrough coach. For the last 25 years, he’s successfully helped over 6k clients breakthrough limited beliefs and challenges to have better relationships, improved family life, and more success!
A pioneer in the field of bridging psychology and Eastern philosophies to technologies, science, and spirituality, Dr. Ray has conducted workshops in the United States, Netherlands, Brazil, and England. He shared the same stages with Marianne Williamson, Bruce Lipton, John Gray, and Eckhart Tolle.
Dr. Ray received his doctoral degree in clinical psychology, earned a master’s degree in counseling psychology, and an undergraduate degree in human behavior.
Other advanced training includes: hypnotherapy, Gestalt therapy, guided imagery, Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), Neuro-linguistic programming (NLP), qigong, PSYCH-K, meditation, sound healing, and somatic experience.
His most profound mentorship involved traveling the world and assisting renowned psychologist Dr. Morris Netherton–a pioneer in his field and colleague of Fritz Perls, Carl Rogers, and Norm Shealy.
And yes, his real last name is Doktor. Everyone gets a laugh about it, so he is used to it.
Ready to heal your body and mind after betrayal? Download your free Betrayal Recovery Toolkit at BetrayalRecoveryGuide.com and book a complimentary 30-minute consultation with Lora today!
Special Announcement!
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Get your free downloadable guide on the “The Top Three Ways You Betray Yourself Every Day, and How to Stop” at www.burnoutorbetrayal.com.
If you’re ready to Rise Up & Reign as the creator and queen of your life, let’s talk. I will walk by your side and give you the perspective, permission, and wisdom needed to turn your betrayal experience into something constructive, empowering, and transformative in all the right ways.
Learn more at www.loracheadle.com and follow me across all social!
Download your Sparkle After Betrayal Recovery Guide at www.BetrayalRecoveryGuide.com, a guide designed to help you take the first steps in feeling better, so you can reclaim your power, own your worth, and start putting yourself, and your life, back together again.
About Lora:
Lora Cheadle is a betrayal recovery coach, attorney, and TEDx speaker who helps women heal from betrayal on an energetic, emotional, and ancestral level—while also providing legal guidance to help them navigate the practical complexities of infidelity and relationship transitions. She empowers women to rise from the ashes, reclaim their identity and self-worth, break free from repeating patterns, and step into their power with confidence, clarity, and grace.
After being shattered by her husband's fifteen years of infidelity, Lora knows firsthand what it takes to transform devastation into an invitation for healing, freedom, and joy. Her unique approach blends deep emotional healing with tangible legal and life strategies, guiding women beyond betrayal into lives of unapologetic confidence and purpose.
As the founder of Life Choreography Coaching & Advocacy, Lora provides comprehensive legal, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual support on demand. She believes that infidelity doesn’t have to be the end of the dream you poured your heart and soul into—it can be the beginning of a life filled with sovereignty, connection, and joy.
Licensed to practice law in California and Colorado, Lora is also a trauma-aware coach, clinical hypnotherapist, somatic attachment therapist, and advanced integrated energy practitioner. She is certified in yoga, mindfulness, group fitness, and personal training, bringing a holistic perspective to healing.
She is the author of FLAUNT! Drop Your Cover and Reveal Your Smart, Sexy, & Spiritual Self (an International Book Awards Finalist and Tattered Cover Bestseller) and It’s Not Burnout, It’s Betrayal: 5 Tools to FUEL UP & Thrive. She also hosts the podcast FLAUNT! Create a Life You Love After Infidelity and Betrayal.
Based in Colorado, Lora is an adventure-seeker who loves travel, a great book, and saying yes to life’s magic.
Get the support you need to find your footing, begin making sense of it all, and feel better fast. As an attorney, betrayal recovery expert, and survivor of infidelity I can help you find the clarity and confidence to create a life that you love on the other side of betrayal. Book Your Session Here: https://calendly.com/loras-schedule/coaching-session
Thank you to BetterHelp for sponsoring this podcast! Take charge of your mental health and get 10% off your first month of therapy at https://BetterHelp.com/FLAUNT
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