Gnar Couch Podshow 155: Crankworx Rotorua Reaction, Dean’s Unclean Peen Sauce, My Own Thoughts Gave Me PTSD

Yo, gnards! Get your bumbs ready because we're diving dick-deep into the tricky shitstorm of omnisexual allure, firing off opinions that are as frank as a nun in a brothel.

We're tearing into the gnar-gnar world of slopestyle and the performance gap between male and female athletes. Are we stoked or just stoking the flame?

Boston Rob experiences TP terror and JP and Cheef plot world domination with their own private army. We'll riff on everything from punk band pussies to why a Mormon militia might just be the shit.

Would you give Dean's Keen Unclean Peen Sauce a try? The only correct answer is yes. Never heard of it? That's because you can't buy it and we just named it. Thanks to Deano the XC Nerd for sending us a bottle. 

JP's angrometer spikes when we discuss the pretty much anything 2024 Crankworx Rotorua. His rant leaves him breathless and flustered, marking the first time this year he's actually gotten angrier than Jimmy.

Low-flying Apache helicopters in Salt Lake Valley send spiraling into fever dream stories that are about as stable as Gary Busey on rollerblades. And if this show isn't dumb enough yet, we discuss ass-cleaning tech because that's just who we are and that's who we care about.

Enjoy this riveting episode!

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00:00 Dealing with fucking ant invasion on toilet.

08:32 Feeling like a total dirtbag uncle, damn.

15:08 Midlife crises at 30 years old.

21:06 Be careful how you expose your kids.

26:14 Confrontation.

28:16 Thickening mustache.

35:42 Sexuality is a fucking complex and diverse thing.

41:37 Confused and frustrated, ready for confrontation.

44:27 Playing brass instruments requires skill and regulation.

51:23 Crafted with fucking crazy exotic fucking ingredients.

59:57 Trains fucking echo through the goddamn gorge.

01:04:14 We wake up and get the hell out!

01:09:29 I'll achieve my goals.

01:16:31 Red Bull Rampage gives out top-notch support.

01:17:00 Sponsors pay for events?

01:22:22 Not whining, but grinding. Earned that mill, hustling, not bitching. Sponsored himself, conquered.

01:29:06 Get 30% off at enjoywinter.com

01:35:54 Toilets with expansive mirrors offer a memorable experience.

01:42:24 Those sellout companies like Nike and Red Bull actually hook their athletes up with sick shit, like hyperbaric chambers for recovery.

01:45:21 A diverse and colorful cast of characters.