116. Mailbag Episode (Validation and Enactments): Nicola Cameo

Welcome to the Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy, hosted by Drs. James Hawkins, Ph.D., LPC, and Ryan Rana, Ph.D., LMFT, LPC—Renowned ICEEFT Therapists, Supervisors, and Trainers. We're thrilled to have you with us. We believe this podcast, a valuable resource, will empower you to push the boundaries in your work, helping individuals and couples connect more deeply with themselves and each other.

Summary: In this episode of the Leading Edge EFT Podcast, Dr. James Hawkins and his wife Nicola explore two critical questions from EFT therapists about navigating complex couple therapy moments. The discussion focuses on validation techniques, managing partner reactions during therapeutic interventions, and the nuanced art of creating emotional safety in couples therapy. Key Topics: Validation in EFT:

• Validating attachment functions, not harmful behaviors

• Balancing validation between partners

• Recognizing the underlying emotional needs behind challenging behaviors

Therapeutic Enactments:

• Navigating client resistance to sharing emotions

• Helping clients express vulnerable feelings in new ways

• Understanding the emotional landscape behind repeated communication patterns

Action Items:

• Explore validation techniques that honor both partners' emotional experiences

• Practice creating safety when challenging client interaction patterns

• Consider attending upcoming EFT training opportunities

Memorable Quote: "You can earn the right to challenge after first meeting your client with validation."

Upcoming events, if you would like to train with James or Ryan…

1. You can do a joint Core Skills (Colorado) with Lisa J. Palmer-Olsen & Dr. James Hawkins. Core Skills Modules 1 and 2 will be held October 8-10, 2025, and Core Skills Modules 3 and 4 will be held January 7-9, 2026. You can register at https://courses.efft.org/courses/2025-core-skills-colorado.
2. October 15-18, 2025, you can do an Externship with James in beautiful Bend, Oregon. You can register at https://www.counseloregon.com.
3. You can train with Ryan, as well as George Faller, doing a live and some time with James, at the annual Arkansas EFT Center externship. July 29-August 1, 2025, in person, in Fayetteville, Arkansas. https://www.arkansaseft.com/events/externship
4. We would like to invite everyone to come hang out and learn with the SV team at the first-ever SV Focus Lab. This is an advanced, EFCT training intending to push the edge with a focus on nuance in application, illuminating EFT and Sue’s incredible model.”
5. You can learn more and register by going to https://www.svfocuslab.com. Leading edge listeners who register before July 1 with the code svfocuslab.com/leadingedge get a 10% discount.

To support our mission and help us continue producing impactful content, your financial contributions via Venmo (@leftpodcast) are greatly appreciated. They play a significant role in keeping this valuable resource available and are a testament to your commitment to our cause.

We aim to equip therapists with practical tools and encouragement for addressing relational distress. We're also excited to be part of the team behind Success in Vulnerability (SV)—your premier online education platform. SV offers innovative instruction to enhance your therapeutic effectiveness through exclusive modules and in-depth clinical examples.

 Stay connected with us:

• Facebook: Follow our page @pushtheleadingedge
• Ryan: Follow @ryanranaprofessionaltraining on Facebook and visit his website
• James: Follow @dochawklpc on Facebook and Instagram, or visit his website at dochawklpc.com
• George Faller: Visit georgefaller.com

If you like the concepts discussed on this podcast you can explore our online training program, Success in Vulnerability (SV).

Thank you for being part of our community. Let's push the leading edge together!