29. Discover and Demolish Your Boundary-Setting Monsters: Find Freedom to Set Sticky Boundaries

What is worse than not setting healthy boundaries? Setting boundaries that don't stick! In today's episode, we will continue to explore effective boundaries and how awareness of our own monsters can instantly add that stickiness we need.

Whether you're making positive changes at work or home, with friends or family, boundaries are part of that process. Let's keep it simple and not overcomplicate things. Let's also remember that we can make decisions, try new things, make mistakes, and adjust as we go. Nobody is perfect! However, your boundaries do need some essential ingredients, and I'll share five key ones in the episode.

We also need to be aware of our own monsters that prevent us from taking courageous and bold moves forward. For me, I can identify five little monsters. Some of these are hardly a nuisance. A couple of these are sticking around and I must get my shoes dirty and trample them when I set boundaries.

The boundary monsters discussed today:

1. Wait! I don't want to be selfish

2. Procrastinate! I can tolerate this a while longer

3.  Rocking the boat! I can't disrupt the status quo

4.  Expensive! I can't afford it

5. Dependents! But they are depending on me.

I believe that our little monsters are spawns of two BIG false beliefs that many of us unknowingly deal with:

1. I am responsible for other people  2. Me and my stuff are not as important (and that's ok).

Awareness is a formidable weapon against these monsters, so let's dig in and talk about it.

The FIVE Essential Ingredients for effective boundaries are not my original discoveries, but a compilation of things I've learned from my favorite boundaries experts like Karla Downing of Change My Relationship. I highly recommend her resources and videos. I've also gleaned wisdom over the years from Dr. Henry Cloud and others. So much credit for my learning and growth belongs to wiser men and women, along with the Holy Spirit who guides me daily.

I'm still on the journey of learning how to set effective boundaries, and with each new life season, I find exciting new challenges and adventures. Gratefully, I now have the foundations and ingredients so that I can set boundaries more quickly and easily. 

Enjoy the episode and remember that we are in this together!

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Have a beautiful day and make something wonderful of it!

Kerri Goodman, Certified Professional Coach, ADHD Coach, Certified Behavior Consultant, Mentor, and Believer in God's purpose for you and your FREEDOM!

MA, CPLC, ACC

SHOW LINKS: All the things mentioned in today's episode are right here!

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Connect with me about today’s episode at imeanttodothat@proton.me