Part 2 - Healing Work, Healing Home, Healing Me with Doug Tieman

Doug Tieman got his start in the treatment field over 40 years ago at the Hazelden Foundation. During his time there, he served as Executive Vice President of Marketing & Development. In 1995, he joined Caron Treatment centers as the President and CEO, a position he’s currently held for 28 years. In part 2 of this episode, Doug shares his own recovery journey and why his wife continued to stay by his side despite the bad reputation and betrayal he caused in active addiction. Doug and Dr. Rob also share when to seek out help if you’re struggling with a substance problem. 

 

TAKEAWAYS:

[1:25] Why did Doug’s wife stay by his side? 

[2:10] This is an illness. 

[2:55] As a way to repair the relationship, Doug started dating his wife again. 

[5:20] Doug felt so much guilt that he had failed his family. He decided to put 100% on his recovery, even if it meant working 14 hours on this to do so. 

[7:45] How could Doug love his wife and at the same time act out and be a sex & love addict? 

[9:10] Doug has a book out, Flying Over the Pigpen. What’s it about? 

[14:00] How do you find a good treatment facility? 

[16:00] What kind of questions should you be asking before you enter into a treatment facility? 

[17:25] What are the signs you need help?

[19:10] With addiction, it only escalates. 

 

RESOURCES:

Sex and Relationship Healing

@RobWeissMSW

Sex Addiction 101 

Seeking Integrity

Cruise Control: Understanding Sex Addiction in Gay Men 

Prodependence: Moving Beyond Codependency

Out of the Doghouse by Robert Weiss

Caron.org

Doug on LinkedIn

Flying Over the Pigpen by Doug Tieman

 

QUOTES:

• “For anyone who suffers from an addiction, that is our first and foremost love affair. We are incapable of having a lasting, meaningful relationship.”
• “I was incapable of a true loving relationship with my wife even though I wanted to because of my substance use and my sex and love addiction.”
• “I always loved my wife, but I was incapable of showing it in a true and meaningful way until I got into recovery.”
• “In addiction, you draw the line and then you redraw it because you cross it. When that happens, get help.”