BE YOURSELF AND DON’T CRASH: Learning How to live with mental illness and the authenticity that is required for it ECLXIII

 First off, I take a moment to address the concerns regarding the facetime and chronicle from this weekend. Then we talk about living life the best way we can.  Being ourselves.  Living a raw, honest, authentic existence.  Not worrying what people think of us despite how we feel.  Everyone has shit to deal with and everyone has victories as well.  We are all on our own path, and we shouldn't have time to concern ourselves with how others do things.  I talk about that as well as a lot of other shit.  Fun episode for sure.

 

HIGHLIGHTS FROM SHOW

 

I wanted to address something real quick before we go on with the show, and it kind of falls in the theme of today's show. So this past week was a real rough week for me, and I talked a little bit about the depression I was feeling on Friday during FaceTime, and I wrote about it on the Chronicle yesterday, and I want to just let people know that I am good. I'm not going to hurt myself. I'm okay, and everything's cool because I got a lot of private messages. I got a lot of things saying you're loved, which I appreciate all that. So thank you, thank you for saying all that. But I will tell you this much: I am not a fucking quitter. So, the one thing I will not do is quit on life, no matter how tough it gets. But what I will say is this: as I am also not a bullshitter, if I am feeling something, I am going to express it, and I am going to tell you about it. I am not going to keep it locked in here, and I'm not going to sit here and play the little good vibes only game that people would like me to play. It's the thing that I've learned about life is when you are not feeling well, then it disturbs people. Okay, and you know what? If my life disturbs you, then get a fucking life. Seriously, if you are someone that really cares, then I love you, and that's beautiful. If you just want to make sure I'm okay, so you can sleep well at night, you know, I may never be okay. I mean, hell, I may not be okay right now when I'm talking to you. I mean, I'm feeling stable, but it doesn't necessarily mean that everything in my life is sugar bowls and cherries and shit, right? But I'm okay, and that's the important thing. And I just want people to know that. And you don't have to worry about Michael like hurting himself

 

 I've made some decisions that have fucked me, that have made me depressed because I am suffering the consequences of my actions, and no one likes to suffer, and the best thing we can all do is just sit through these things and just let them play out and hope that they don't bite us in the ass. And I'm sorry, there are decisions you're going to make in life that will bite you in the ass. You just have to wait for your ass to heal. And I will say this much: killing yourself is not going to make your ass heal. You may you may not have a chance to do anything, heal anything if you do that. Because once you punch that ticket in, it's over. There is no more coming back from that. There is no trying to make amends. With people, there is no giving people time to digest you. There's none of that anymore. That shit's over with. And here's the thing: if people can't digest you, like I think her name is Skydaddy, let them fucking choke. Because you live for you. You do what you need to do, and if you're not hurting anyone, if you're not stepping on anyone, you continue to do what you need to do. And if you do end up stepping on someone or hurting someone, you try to make good for it and you move on. And that's the important thing. So that's the reason why. Yes, I was very depressed, but I'm good, and I just want to come here and let everyone know that I'm good, and I am gonna. I'll tell you right now. There are gonna be times that I come on breathing bounds, whether it be on the FaceTime, whether it be on the Chronicle, whether it be right here on the show. That I'm gonna tell you I'm fucking depressed. There is gonna be times, and there are gonna be times where I take you in real dark places because of my depression. Because I want you to feel what I'm feeling because if you're someone that doesn't deal with depression, I want you to understand how serious it is. And if you are someone that does deal with depression, I want you to know that I see you and I know what you're going through, and you are not alone. And those those things are very important. Now, now that I got all that shit out of the way, let's go on with the show. And if you're watching this on video, www.breathandbounce.com. If you accidentally came across my video, so I want what I'm talking about today is really very much about all that depression, and I'm talking about hitting the wall, and we hit walls all the time in life. We find ways to make our life more fucked up than it is, or you know whatever. Or maybe we're living this beautiful life, and then reality smacks us in the face, and we have to say shit. I am here to let you know that you are not going to go through your life beautiful peaches scenes.

 

You know, there's nothing wrong with not feeling happy all the time. You know, some people sit here and they say, "Oh, you have to be happy. Be happy. Happy's great. We want to feel so happy all the time. We want to fucking fuck ourselves with a happy dildo. I mean, you can't be happy all the time. It is completely illogical to be happy all the time. And if you think you are happy all the time, what about all those moments when you're sitting by yourself and you feel disappointed about something that might have happened to you? Does that mean you're still happy? Oh, I try to keep a positive attitude. You know what? It's okay to keep a positive attitude, but don't push your positive attitude agenda on all of us because some of us are not ready for that. We're not ready to digest that. You know, it's kind of like you go to a bar, you know, and they have jello shots. Maybe you're not a jello shot person, and maybe you don't need the happiness jello shots coming your way. You need to just be alone and drink your fucking Jack Daniels in the corner and say fuck it, right, right.