Allow Yourself To Be A Different Person In Different Situations

Allow Yourself To Be A Different Person In Different Situations

(Part 1 of a 2)

Many people struggle with this. Any situation that may be different from the norm could require you to be a slightly different version of yourself.

Take for example, going for the driving test. It can be hard to allow yourself to demonstrate the correct form and technique. It can feel weird to some people because essentially you have to allow yourself to show off.  This uneasy feeling will add to your nerves.

I did the California driving test years ago but that was a little bit of an easier test than the Irish one. With the Irish driving test, you have to display and demonstrate that you are observing the mirrors and using the correct handling of the steering wheel etc. It's more like a demonstration and a performance.

I see people’s inner conflict all the time in martial arts. It’s a similar process when you are going for a belt test. You need to perform. If you're somebody who thinks that a loud personality is annoying or that someone who is demonstrating is a show-off then you're going to struggle. There are certain situations and certain times in life when you need to show-off. You have to allow yourself to do that. It could be to do with work. It could be to impress a future client, a future customer or to win a contract. You will have to put yourself forward. You will need to project a different side of yourself. You will have to let your personality shine in a different way than if you were simply going to the shops. 

People may find it hard to be a different version of themselves because a lot of people are scared of change. They don't embrace change. They're afraid that if they display any kind of a change in their personality that they're not being authentic or they're being fake. If you're tailoring your personality to allow yourself to be a different person in different situations, that's not fake. You're being fake if you change your core beliefs, your ethics, and your own moral values. If you're tailoring your personality to allow yourself to be a different person in different situations, that's not fake. 

When I was competitively fighting, I had to allow myself to be hyper competitive. I had to allow myself to be that version of myself. Outside of competing, I would hate to think that I was a very competitive person with anyone else. With myself, yes but with not anyone else. My wife might disagree with me because she thinks that I can bring competitiveness into games like ‘Monopoly’. I think I have it under control except for when I'm competing. When I'm fighting, I allow myself to be a different version of myself and I allow myself to be that hyper competitive person. This is a completely different side of my personality. When I'm interacting with people on a day-to-day basis they may not realise that I have that competitiveness within me. Normal, daily activities don't require that side of your personality.

We all have different sides of our personalities for different situations so it’s important not to fight it. Your competitive side, your work side, your personal side, your loving side, your business or investing side all require different versions of you.Parents with young children might have to struggle with switching personality traits much more frequently!

My generation X readers might remember Worzel Gummidge. He was a loveable scarecrow and he had different heads for different situations. If only it were so simple.

Have you ever seen the circus act of spinning the plates on top of sticks? They spin one and then another and another. They have to run quickly back to the first one to spin it again and it’s some job trying to keep them all spinning without any falling and smashing.  This is similar to the juggling act that is our lives. We have all these different hats on and different roles of responsibility. We're different people in different moments of time and you should allow yourself to be. Allow yourself to be the best version of yourself at any chosen time. 

One person’s experience of meeting you could be very different from another person’s depending on how they're interacting with you. Obviously, if somebody is really nice to you or it's a friend, a family member or a loved one, you're going to be one version of yourself. If someone else is trying to run you off the road or just not being very nice, they're going to see a very different side of you. They’ll probably hear a very different side of you too!

It's okay to be a different person in different situations and to tailor your personality to best suit whatever situation is at hand to get the best out of yourself and that situation. That's totally normal. Accept that fact. Don't fight against it because it will cause inner confusion that affects you from successfully dealing with whatever you need to. I hope this helps you to avoid a potential identity crisis! Allow yourself to be a different person in different situations.

Next week’s blog is part 2 as it leads on from this one. Make sure you don’t miss, ‘How To Turn On Your Mind Switch’.

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By Roundhouse Rob, The Success Sensei

Robert Devane is a serial entrepreneur and experienced investor as well as a former martial arts multiple World champion and professional MMA fighter with over 20 years of coaching experience.

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