#37 A Dad’s Perspective on Second Trimester Stillbirth and Pregnancy After Loss

It’s the start of baby loss awareness week and I have a very special guest on the podcast – my husband, Sam. He has been my rock throughout our marriage and particularly over the last year and a half after losing Skye and during my pregnancy with our rainbow baby.

Sam is very much a lurker on the edge of the baby loss community, and unlike some of my previous guests who’ve chosen to speak out about their experiences, is quite a private person. For this reason, I think this episode might be particularly helpful for those dads and partners who perhaps don’t talk about their children as much, and for mums who maybe get frustrated that their partners don’t express their grief so openly.

In the interview we talk about:

• How Sam felt when I showed him the positive pregnancy test and his awareness of baby loss (12:37)
• Finding out that Skye had died and the in-between days (15:53)
• Going into hospital for Skye’s birth and seeing her for the first time (21:51)
• Feeling sidelined by staff as the birth partner and father (29:48)
• Sam’s grief journey, unpicking emotions and unexpected triggers (36:03)
• How we remember Skye in our day to day lives and talking to other people about her (42:05)
• His experience of pregnancy after loss (46:16)

In the intro, I talk about Baby Loss Awareness Week and the Wave of Light which will take place at 7pm on Thursday 15th October.

While this is a special time to remember our babies, it can also mean that feelings of grief, loss and anger can bubble up or overwhelm us, so do be gentle with yourselves, take time for self-care and to let yourself grieve if that’s what you need to do.

If you enjoy the podcast, I’d really appreciate it if you could leave a review on your podcast app. You can connect with me on Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/footprintsonourhearts/) and Twitter (https://twitter.com/skyesfootprints) or email alison@footprintsonourhearts.com.