Treat Receiving Feedback as a Skill

I often hear feedback that elicits a negative response called "constructive feedback". That's a hopeful name. We hope that we'll be constructive with this feedback and not just be negative about it. But even the most well trained feedback receiver still feels that initial burst of negative feelings to the feedback. It's ok. It's not self hate. I mean it could be for some, but often it's a smaller negative feeling. Maybe you feel you let someone down, maybe you're hearing a known strength is letting you down, or maybe it's something you thought you overcame. In her 2015 TedTalk, Sheila Heen recommends treating feedback as a skill, and the majority of this article ties back to her core beliefs on the topic. Treating feedback as a skill allows you to be less dependent on the giver of feedback and puts the onus of transitioning from "negative" to "constructive" feedback then "constructive" to "actionable" feedback on you, the listener.