Busyness is Not a Badge of Honor

Why do people seem to take so much pride in how busy they are? I'm all for hard work, but if you don't have time for anything else, what's the point?

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Because this seems to keep coming up in my conversations, both on this podcast and outside of it, I want to talk about it more specifically. There’s an epidemic out there, at least in America, where people use the word “busy” as an emblem of pride.

“I’m soooo busy.”

“Oh, work is great. I barely have time to sleep.”

“Oh man, I was so slammed today I completely forgot to eat.”

“You gotta hustle.”

I’m sure you’ve heard all this before. But why? We do you “gotta” hustle? I’m all for hard work, as you know. You don’t find success by doing nothing. But if you’re working so hard that you don’t have time for anything else, what’s the point?

Even if you love what you do, you need time for other things. You need a mental break from work. Time with people who aren’t your clients and vendors, even if it’s not in person.

If you Google quotes for motivation, you’ll find all kinds of memes about the hustle that are meant to be inspirational. So I’m sure my opinion on this matter is not the norm. It often isn’t. But I have never had the goal to be busy. I’ve wanted to accomplish things. I’ve wanted to be successful. I’ve wanted specific outcomes to result from my hard work. But I have never once thought, I wish I was busier.

My definition of successful doesn’t include constant busyness. I don’t want to be so busy building an empire that there isn’t time for anything else. Maybe that means I’ll never have an international multi-billion dollar corporation to my name, but that’s okay with me.

When I was contemplating leaving the corporate world, many people assumed I would start my own production company. It would’ve made sense considering I’d been managing them for so many years. But I never had any interest in that. I didn’t want a company with a building and employees and overhead and all the hassle that comes with that. I wanted something simple, where all I really needed was my laptop, minimal software, and an Internet connection. I didn’t want other people relying on me for their salaries and livelihood. I didn’t want to be stuck at another place for several hours a day, unless that place was my home. I really just wanted to do my own thing. That’s what I’ve been doing ever since.

I know I’ve said it here before, but my biggest goal in starting my business was to make more and work less. That was it. Sure, I wanted to enjoy my work more by choosing the people around me and what my schedule would be. I wanted the freedom of self-employment. I still enjoy that every single day. Goal accomplished.

But as I was working my way here, I never used the word hustle, or even thought of it in that manner. Like many of you, I started building my business while I was still employed full-time. I didn’t feel ready to just throw caution to the wind and let go of my stable income. I still had a lot of things to figure out, and at the time, I thought it was best to try to do both. But I never called Aardvark Girl my side hustle. I wasn’t moonlighting or freelancing “on the side.” I always had that mindset that I was building a business.

Of course, I was working extra hours when I was balancing them both, but that only lasted for a few months. I learned pretty early on that the 40-50 hours a week I was spending at my job was 40-50 hours a week I could be working on my own business. I wasn’t going to find the right clients and projects when I only had a few spare hours a day. So if I was going to give my time and energy to a company, I might as well do it for mine, right?

But that type of thinking goes back way further than that for me. I got my first job when I was 16. I remember telling people that I was going to work hard while I was young so I didn’t have to when I was older. I didn’t know when “older” would be, but I knew it was worthwhile to start early. People my age didn’t always understand. They rarely did. It actually started a whole debate in my AP government class in high school, but that’s another story. Then in college, a lot of people thought I was missing out on all the fun. I didn’t live on campus. I didn’t do anything or join anything school related. I didn’t party. I didn’t do any of those things you’re apparently “supposed to” do at that age. But I never felt like I was missing out on anything. I didn’t want to do those things. Come on, could you really see me in a sorority? I didn’t think so.

Instead, I was earning money. I was learning how to run a business. I asked questions. My boss taught me about IRAs. At one point I was working a full-time job, a part-time job, taking a full college course load, and maintaining my 4.0 GPA. I was truly busy. I don’t regret that at all, but I have never wanted to chase that feeling again. I did what I had to do to get where I wanted to be. That’s important. I’m grateful I started young because that’s what got me ahead. I didn’t spend 4 years having the traditional college experience. I spent those years building the foundation of my career instead.

But again, I always had that mindset that I was going to work hard then so I wouldn’t have to later on. Fast forward to later on. Like I said earlier, when I finally decided it was time to leave the corporate world to work for myself, it wasn’t so I could hustle and grind… a phrase I don’t think I’ve ever used outside of this conversation. My goal was to work less and make more. And that’s what I’ve done every year I’ve been in business. I actually use my old salary and the number of hours I worked every week (including commute time) as the measuring stick to remind myself that I made the right decision. My life is way more fulfilling because I’m more intentional with my time… because I own it.

I’m plenty busy. I’m not opposed to busy. But I do believe in the necessity of balance. If you take on a project that is going to eat up a bunch of your time, finding those little pockets to rest and decompress are more important than ever. It means that during those times, you have to be extra careful and make sure you don’t lose sight of what’s important – the basics like eating, sleeping, and exercising. Do what you need to do to take care of yourself while also taking care of your business.

I’m not trying to tell anyone that being busy is a bad thing, or that it’s realistic to be a business owner who isn’t juggling a lot of things all the time. It’s more about being mindful about your decisions and why you’re so busy. Is it because you are putting in the necessary work, or are you not being efficient with your time? Are you spending your time being productive and working towards something, or are you avoiding something else in your life by burying yourself in your work? Do you think others will judge you if you don’t give the impression that you’re constantly hustling? I’m asking these questions because I’m genuinely curious why busyness is that badge so many wear with pride.

It’s not because I don’t know what it means to hustle. It’s because I don’t know why it seems to be something people strive to do.

A few years ago, I traveled for the majority of the summer making the Dream Out Loud documentary. 25 cities in 3 months. It was a lot. I didn’t put my whole business on hold just because I was pursuing my passion project. I continued to do my other client work because I didn’t want to neglect what I’d worked so hard to build. Sometimes it meant I was in the passenger seat with my laptop working on a spreadsheet during the drive from one state to the next. Other times it meant being up at weird hours because I was in Ireland and my clients were in a much different time zone. It often meant getting up early and staying up late to work on other things because I was spending the rest of the day filming interviews for something that was important to me. But that busyness was temporary. I knew that, and it’s why I was okay doing it for a little bit.

Then last summer, I put my plans on hold to take a 3-month job, which turned into a 7-month job. That was also an informed decision. We were in the middle of a pandemic, production work had ceased, and this was a good opportunity that would allow me to do the work I enjoy from the safety of my home. It was a no brainer. But that show was considered full time for those months and I still, thankfully, had all of my regular retainer clients. And there are often times when everyone needs me all at once. I know they rely on me, so I find a way to make it work. It’s a challenge I’m grateful to have. And during those months, I didn’t completely neglect my personal projects, but when I felt I was too busy, I made the choice to stop. I prioritized all the things I needed to do, which included taking breaks to make sure I wasn’t overdoing it.

I do get the intention behind the “hustle” concept. The idea that we need to work hard for the things we want in life, and sometimes we have to make sacrifices to get there. It’s part of the journey. The best accomplishments rarely come easily, but that’s what makes them so rewarding. And hey, if you’re truly happy with being soooo busy all the time, don’t listen to me. I just hope you’re being honest with yourself about why that’s the lifestyle you want. I treasure my down time. Sometimes nothing is one of my favorite things to do. Not out of laziness, but because I earned it.

When you’re ambitious, you tend to work hard, accomplish a goal, and then instantly start working towards the next one. I tend to be that way myself sometimes, so I understand. But every now and then it’s more important to take a moment to enjoy what you’ve achieved. Pause and appreciate that you can take a break.

Owning a business is a constant juggling act, whether you’re one person doing it all or if you have a whole team. Busy isn’t a negative word. I’m not opposed to busyness in general. Busy is usually a good indication that your business is doing well. What I don’t get is when people define their quality of life by how busy they are, especially if that busy-ness they’re bragging about is secretly stressing them out. So be mindful of your workload and how much you choose to take on at a time. Hustle when you need to, but don’t make a constant grind your end goal. Work smart so you can have it all – a thriving business, and some time off to proudly spend however you want.